endlessly

Another night of drunken debauchery last night. I found out some very horrible news yesterday and had to drink my sorrows away. Something I was sure............. well, I was hoping at least, that was for us and us only she is sharing with him. It simply broke me down. Was our relationship nothing to her at all? I feel like I was just a bump in the road for her. I'm living in hell right now knowing that some of the most intimate details of our relationship she is already using in her new relationship, like all I was was a summer fling for her. Three years of promises and this is what I get. I wish I could be mad at her, I wish I could hate her, I wish I didn't think about her every second of the day, but I love her in a way I didn't realize was possible, and all I want is to have her in my arms again.