Monday Dec 05, 2005

0
unfurl part two

I vomited in my mouth, but only a tiny tiny bit. Decades of cigerettes and cocaine abuse had surely rendered this old woman's sense of smell obsolete, I was in the clear. Meanwhile Eron had set position between the two hags and was operating at full Eye Candy Mode. I took my leave and escaped into the pool room.

"Only Breakfast...Only...
Read More
VIEW 23 of 23 COMMENTS
unite105:
i'd read his stuff in esquire before, which prompted me to buy this one, and almost buy killing yourself to live. and then I doscovered that he had another. i'm going to be quite poor for a little bit, but I think the girl is going to get me at least one for christmas, which will rock.
leanimal:
Thanks! I appreciate it. I really wanted to use several fucks and shove its, but I thought I made the point better without it. I think I was mostly disappointed at how a person who claims to have travelled a lot (of which I'm completely jealous) learned exactly how not to be open-minded. Isn't that sorta the whole point of getting out there and seeing the world?

Ok. I shall not rant in your journal. Your cat is very cute.

Saturday Dec 03, 2005

0
I wake up and instinctively check for my penis. Still there. Where's my wallet?! On the desk...with my keys thank God. Surviving the previous night intact in the state I was in deserves a medal and cash reward. Does the Society For The Prevention of Elderly Blowjobs still give out scholarships?

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

The night was drawing to a close when...
Read More
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
braveart:
oh my..is this coming out on dvd soon? i hope so..
smuffy:
our SG anniversary is in three days!

Saturday Dec 03, 2005

0
I wake up and instinctively check for my penis. Still there. Where's my wallet?! On the desk...with my keys thank God. Surviving the previous night intact in the state I was in deserves a medal and cash reward. Does the Society For The Prevention of Elderly Blowjobs still give out scholarships?

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

The night was drawing to a close when...
Read More
evanx:
Good thing it's not detachable.

Sunday Nov 27, 2005

0

Read More
VIEW 25 of 102 COMMENTS
toothpickmoe:
Thanks, man.

I'm warming up for my first round...
tangledupinblue:
it was the second time -- but the first was haranguing him for unoriginality

Wednesday Nov 23, 2005

0

Read More
VIEW 25 of 34 COMMENTS
smuffy:
ok you're down to one sentence replies.

are you getting dreamy?

how was your turkey day?
smuffy:
well don't update now, unless you want to.

I need to go call a TSS hotline or something.

and then I will eat more cereal!

I can't tell by your description whether you had a shitty thanksgiving day or not. in any case, even if it's boring I'm sure it will sound very fun and lively, considering your more than awesome writing abilities.

nice chatting with you but I'm hungry, tired and possibly dying, so chat with you another day. kiss kiss kiss

Monday Nov 21, 2005

0
You're hot, stop and drop and roll
I'll jump in the swimming hole so i can hear your cheers
I've seen all the episodes
I know all the secret codes so where i go i don't need roads

I'm flying over, over, i'll fly right over you

2P, you take my control
Teach me how to rock and roll or i'll fall down and die...
Read More
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
fridgemagnet:
No, really.

Have you ev-ever been dragged out the the side walk and b-b-beaten 'til you p.....iss blood! I loled.
_dictionarygirl_:
I miss the Ozma. frown

Thursday Nov 17, 2005

0

Read More
VIEW 25 of 38 COMMENTS
johnclement:
Success.

How do I log off of that site? I don't see a button anywhere.
johnclement:
Okay. Guess I'll just close it out.

Monday Nov 14, 2005

0
I'm going to start something called The Brutal Society of The Breaking Hand or something.

Sunday Nov 13, 2005

0
So Obsessed With Beauty In The Mud He Sat There Thinking About Rain

I stormed up Jack's stairs and laying on the seat I had already chosen in my mind was a mandolin. I picked up the mandolin, plucked a string and held onto that tiny beast for the rest of the night. Nate picked up a drum, Ryan and Jack shared guitar duties and...
Read More
VIEW 25 of 35 COMMENTS
alpo:
Precocious, huh? Me too. I'm having a midlife crisis and I'm only 33. biggrin
smuffy:

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
hi ben!

I'm typing this, after having taken an hour-long nap! what the fuck!? I think it's because I'm having anxiety over a kind of frightening situation and it's seriously sapping me of my energy. after I finish typing this, I need to somehow finish cleaning the fuck up. I can't just be a slug all day, can I?

never mind. don't answer that. you'd just say it was ok, you slug. tongue (haha just kidding.) I feel ok being mean to you, as I know the only day of the year you might ever be truly nice to me is on my birthday.

before I tell you what's got me shitting bricks, I'll tell you about that nightmare. I was at my house and sunny was visiting me. I know, isn't that cool? anyway, she was here and we were chillin' and we looked at SG for some reason and I noticed you had gone grey. SG was different, as it showed your last journal entry, which was something like 'it's that time' and you had a pictures of the date january 1, 2006. isn't that fucking weird? anyway, I proceeded to buy you a gift membership, because I just can't deal if you're not on SG. sunny was all like ew. yeah I know you hate that, but she's so fond of ew'ing everything. have no clue why she'd even 'ew' me, as you are one of her favorite people.

so that was my nightmare. it was a good dream. the only nightmare part was that you were grey. eek!

ok well I hope that was at least funny. I'm not sure I'm any good at typing out these long comments anymore. before they were to make you laugh or feel good about yourself, but these days I'm so nervous around you that I don't even know what to say to you, other than yell at you, of course.

here is my scary situation: on saturday night, I met a guy. he was a great dancer and everything and we danced for two hours straight and I came out of the club with we hair, but I knew right away he's not relationship material and that he was strictly just a fun dancer and maybe even just a club ho. he got my number by very cleverly stealing my cell phone and dialing his number into it. voila! just like that, he scored the digits. I was too drunk to care, plus I figured hey it's just a cell phone. I can easily ignore that shit.

well, he called me three times the very same night and he called on sunday. I actually talked to him on sunday and told him I'd call him back later, but he proceeded to call me 7 or 8 times, including once this morning at 7a.m. shocked he's called several or more times throughout the day, but it's been so many times already that I lost count. so from 2-3 pm I napped. I feel like hiding, ben. what do I do? I hate this. I don't like the guy, but he's suffering from the crazies and I hate having to be mean to people.

moreover, this is so typical. the one guy I truly like won't call me. and don't ask who the one guy is, because I'll never tell you. anyway, I get losers like this who call me. no one worthwhile. it just gets me to wonder that maybe I deserve absolutely nothing good in this world. I love my freedom, but I also like being in love, but it just seems like it's not in the cards for me. I either bag guys who treat me like crap, ignore me, blow me off or guys who are insane. I'd prefer neither of these options. what's your theory on all of this? or maybe you have no theory at all, which is just as well. this was good way for me to blow off steam.

this turned a little whiny and you probably wanted/expected something more fun, but this shit's got me on edge, man. by the way, hidden in these paragraphs will be this piece of new: I finally dropped kevin bacon (clubs baby seals, etc.). he tried to start shit with me again. I don't know why he continued to be my friend, seeing how very little he actually liked me as a person. you know? maybe he just liked to have someone to pick on.

so I'm going to the dominican republic soon. I'm very excited. we're going to punta cana. alas it will only be for 5 days. shucks. when are you coming back to the east coast again, by the way? I mean, after this upcoming visit. do you think it might be soonish? will you ever come to cape cod? will you ever move here!? tongue

um yeah ok, I really need to get going now. on top of my stalker anxiety, I now have anxiety over all the things I still have left to do. bye benny ben ben. ♥

Load more