So uh....today's my first official day off in about a month. I've spent it in bed and on the internet so far. (The in bed part being my fave.)
UPDATES
There was a big ol' flood in Findlay, the biggest in over 100 years. My parents' house is in the worst flood area in town, with a river that runs right through their backyard, and they got hit pretty bad. They had to be rescued from their house after the waters reached the basement ceiling, and didn't go home for two days. So we all thought the water just kept rising and that the house would be completely destroyed, that they'd have to move, etc. (Little side note....my parents are pretty poor. They make maybe 20g's a year, since my dad can never seem to hold down a job, and they have an old run down house with a huge mortgage and spend beyond their means. So the idea of moving is fuckin impossible.) Well, it turns out that the water began to subside just before reaching the first floor of the house. The basement was in pretty bad shape, with the furnace, water heater, freezer, and 23 years worth of junk destroyed. My mom is a crazy packrat, and they literally had piles upon piles of old junk and antiques that filled the entire basement, which is pretty large. AND guess who got to clean it all up!?!?! That's right, me. Along with my brother and boyfriend. All covered in nasty sewer sludge. I almost puked when we emptied out the freezer filled with EXPIRED meat that had been floating in the water. Anyway, my parents are ok, and the flood ended up being a blessing in disguise because their flood insurance (payed by my grandmother,) covered a bunch of shit that needed to be fixed that would have otherwise never been taken care of. Not to mention the fact that the basement is the cleanest it's been in over a decade! Natural disasters can be sweet like that.
Speaking of natural disasters, I got to ride my bike home through a TORNADO 2 weeks ago. It was pretty fucking awesome. I felt like such a survivor afterwards, haha.
Haven't heard anything from the crazy landlord or received a court notice, so I hope that's a good sign?
Quit my job. Well, Weds is my last day. The Bodies Exhibition itself is pretty cool, but the management is fucking retarded, and I just can't deal with retarded. I'm retarded enough by myself. So I'm on the lookout for a job, again.
You know what? I fucking hate working. I hate having to hold down a job. It is the most unnatural fucking thing in the world. I mean, isn't it why we all abhor working so much? We all inherently know that this isn't how we should be spending our lives, wasting our precious time in exchange for a little cash, all the while making some lazy douchebag fucking rich. I don't mind labor, in itself. I'm okay with the idea of working if it's for yourself and your family. But as much as I try, I just can't convince myself that being part of the modern day "workforce" is for my own security and well-being. I don't see any personal benefits from it; if anything, work is the one thing that stands in the way of my personal fulfillment and the ability to share my talents and joy with other people. The reason we work is not to make money for ourselves, it is not to make sure our families are happy and safe and fed. We could do all of that, (even moreso!,) if it weren't for that damn job taking us away from our homes and families 8 hours a day, and then leaving us with little energy for anything else. No, we work for the fucking man. We work to make sure that the powers that be stay in power and have fat pockets. It kills me to know that someone else is selfishly banking off my fucking time. And here comes the hard part: how can I get out of this? What can I do to escape this trap? I....have no answers. I want to work for myself, not someone else. But doing what? What can I do that is both personally, mentally, creatively, and financially rewarding? Is it even possible? I'm almost 24 years old, and I feel like I'm approaching a fork in the road. Do I just give in, ignore all of these thoughts and just waste my life like so many people, safe and robotic? Or do I throw caution to the wind and do something, ANYTHING, that gives me personal fulfillment but an uncertain future?
This is what has been occupying my thoughts lately. Does anyone else feel this way?
UPDATES
There was a big ol' flood in Findlay, the biggest in over 100 years. My parents' house is in the worst flood area in town, with a river that runs right through their backyard, and they got hit pretty bad. They had to be rescued from their house after the waters reached the basement ceiling, and didn't go home for two days. So we all thought the water just kept rising and that the house would be completely destroyed, that they'd have to move, etc. (Little side note....my parents are pretty poor. They make maybe 20g's a year, since my dad can never seem to hold down a job, and they have an old run down house with a huge mortgage and spend beyond their means. So the idea of moving is fuckin impossible.) Well, it turns out that the water began to subside just before reaching the first floor of the house. The basement was in pretty bad shape, with the furnace, water heater, freezer, and 23 years worth of junk destroyed. My mom is a crazy packrat, and they literally had piles upon piles of old junk and antiques that filled the entire basement, which is pretty large. AND guess who got to clean it all up!?!?! That's right, me. Along with my brother and boyfriend. All covered in nasty sewer sludge. I almost puked when we emptied out the freezer filled with EXPIRED meat that had been floating in the water. Anyway, my parents are ok, and the flood ended up being a blessing in disguise because their flood insurance (payed by my grandmother,) covered a bunch of shit that needed to be fixed that would have otherwise never been taken care of. Not to mention the fact that the basement is the cleanest it's been in over a decade! Natural disasters can be sweet like that.
Speaking of natural disasters, I got to ride my bike home through a TORNADO 2 weeks ago. It was pretty fucking awesome. I felt like such a survivor afterwards, haha.
Haven't heard anything from the crazy landlord or received a court notice, so I hope that's a good sign?
Quit my job. Well, Weds is my last day. The Bodies Exhibition itself is pretty cool, but the management is fucking retarded, and I just can't deal with retarded. I'm retarded enough by myself. So I'm on the lookout for a job, again.
You know what? I fucking hate working. I hate having to hold down a job. It is the most unnatural fucking thing in the world. I mean, isn't it why we all abhor working so much? We all inherently know that this isn't how we should be spending our lives, wasting our precious time in exchange for a little cash, all the while making some lazy douchebag fucking rich. I don't mind labor, in itself. I'm okay with the idea of working if it's for yourself and your family. But as much as I try, I just can't convince myself that being part of the modern day "workforce" is for my own security and well-being. I don't see any personal benefits from it; if anything, work is the one thing that stands in the way of my personal fulfillment and the ability to share my talents and joy with other people. The reason we work is not to make money for ourselves, it is not to make sure our families are happy and safe and fed. We could do all of that, (even moreso!,) if it weren't for that damn job taking us away from our homes and families 8 hours a day, and then leaving us with little energy for anything else. No, we work for the fucking man. We work to make sure that the powers that be stay in power and have fat pockets. It kills me to know that someone else is selfishly banking off my fucking time. And here comes the hard part: how can I get out of this? What can I do to escape this trap? I....have no answers. I want to work for myself, not someone else. But doing what? What can I do that is both personally, mentally, creatively, and financially rewarding? Is it even possible? I'm almost 24 years old, and I feel like I'm approaching a fork in the road. Do I just give in, ignore all of these thoughts and just waste my life like so many people, safe and robotic? Or do I throw caution to the wind and do something, ANYTHING, that gives me personal fulfillment but an uncertain future?
This is what has been occupying my thoughts lately. Does anyone else feel this way?
I love riding into a storm...the air is charged and the sense of the unknown is pretty cool.
Yeah...the job thing sucks....i have had a lot of various jobs in school, there is something pretty cool about starting your own, if you can find something you can do on your own.
Good luck with the new search, Emiloo...hope you find something soon that is more satisfying.
Sidenote: Did you see the movie, Shopgirl?