elysianzero

So... I know I haven't blogged anything new since August, so I thought I'd just post a little something to break up the monotony. Now, this probably won't be all that interesting, but ya know what? I don't care.

So Labias and Genitals, may I present to you:


~* ~ 10 Things Jess Has Thought, Is Thinking, or Will Think About ~ * ~


#1. I NEVER HAVE BEEN, NOR WILL I EVER BE one of those adorably dainty, sweet, quite feminine little things... You know the kind, the flawless-looking, won't-eat-anything-larger-than-a-salad-on-a-date, would-never-admit-she-poops, cringes-at-foul-language, and would-blow-away-if-a-strong-wind-came-along types. In the end, I'm not sure I'd want to be either (though, admittedly, I'd probably be more successful in the dating department). I'm pretty sure I tend to take people aback with my [often] blunt attitude. I'm also pretty sure I've turned off quite a few guys who are expecting the "petite pixie" they see on the outside and end up with someone akin to the bastard love-child of Kathy Griffin & George Carlin. I'm not a Prom or Homecoming Queen. I'm 5'2 1/2" and 110lbs and can (and have) walk down the streets of New York, LA, Chicago, and Las Vegas, at night, by myself without much hesitancy. Oh, and I've never fake-baked.


#2. GOLDEN GLOBE NOMS ARE IN... and where the fuck is "The Dark Knight"?! ONE nomination? Same as Pineapple Express Srsly!? WTF!? Admittedly, it's the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, who are even bigger elitist (not to mention mysterious) bastards than the AMPAS


#3. I FINALLY FINISHED WATCHING CAROUSEL... and it only took me 10 freaking years! I also re-watched Oklahoma! in the same day, thus causing me to remember that I kinda had a little crush on Gordon MacRae "If I Loved You (Reprise)" (Makes me misty eyed!)


And just because I will find any excuse to post this video, here's Patrick Wilson (who also played Billy Bigalow in the 1996 national tour) singing a slightly condensed version of "If I Loved You"



#4. WHY THE HELL doesn't SG have an option to "Preview" your posts before you post them? I'm getting tired of either having to constantly post something before it's finished (like this blog) and then going back and forth to edit the damn thing OR only having a 15 minute window (which, I'm convinced, only gives you around 5 minutes) to edit.


#5. I CAN HAZ KERUPSHUN? KTHNXBYE Ha! I just saw THIS up on Yahoo! and it made me giggle Notice how D.C. is listed, and yet (conveniently?) left unaccounted for... Me thinks this map is full of teh kerupshun of which it speaks.


#6. WATCHMEN FANS: I can't decide whether they're better or worse than Tolkien fans...

Now, don't get me wrong... I mean, bless those lovely fanboys and girls! But what I've come to realize is that I can't take Fandom anymore. I don't want to get into why - that's a long story - but suffice it to say that as addicted to things as I get (much to everyone around me and my own annoyance), it takes a certain kind of fan to proclaim that a director/writer lacks any and all respect for the source material if even the smallest thing is changed...

I realize that that ending statement seems vague, but for those of you who know about the fans of which I speak, you'll get what I mean... understand? Yeah, me neither...


#7. I HOPE THIS WEEKEND ISN'T AWKWARD. That's all.


#8. FOR A MUSIC NERD, I'M SLOW ON THE UPTAKE! Okay, so, as crazy as I am about music, I have this really bad habit of not listening to [bands] as soon as I should. I think, partly, it may have to to the fact that I tend to dislike radio and the only times I DO like it, it's between 11pm-12am when I've just started work and don't really have the time to give it a good listen. (It's called Indie Soundcheck - when our local Indie/Alternative station will (sometimes) play the good stuff; no Fall Out Boy or Coldplay or Katy Perry to ruin my appetite Though, I have found that, occasionally, its pretentious hipster fan-base will get in the way of its full potential )

Speaking of... You Hipsters out there? Stop it. Seriously. I like the way some of you guys dress, but your stuck-up little know-it-all asses drive me bonkers. And for those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, take a look at this: The Hipster Handbook. Good times


#9. SPEAKING OF MUSIC... I keep meaning to put out my own little (er, okay, not so little) "Playlist of 2008". Of course, because of the above mentioned self-induced naivete, a majority of my playlist won't be songs from 2008; maybe only about 1/3 or so. Also, I'm having the hardest time narrowing my playlist down to 20-25 songs. Every time I try, I end up with around 40 (give or take). Maybe I'll post it in sections, since I tend to repeat artists (occasionally up to 3 times, 'cause I'm snobby like that). And so as to not leave those of you who give a shit hanging, here's a Not-Necessarily-Top-10 song sample of my list:

1. The Beginning Is The End Is The Beginning - The Smashing Pumpkins
2. You Send Shivers - The Blue Jackets
3. How We Operate - Gomez
4. The Other Side Of Mt. Heart Attack - Liars
5. Why Do You Let Me Stay Here? - She & Him
6. Escape The Nest - Editors
7. The Spell - The Black Heart Procession
8. Elephant Woman - Blonde Redhead
9. Love Lockdown - Kanye West
10. The Hour Of The Wolf - Madrugada


#10. LITTLE OLD NEW YORK... A place I'm so excited to get back to (even if it is during the winter...) I'll be visiting from January 8th-12th in a wonderfully priced, fantastically located little hostel close to Times Square I told myself that I would never again stay at a hostel after the shit-hole I was in the last time I was there, but with the lack of cash, limited ability to travel (within the city, I mean) and the weather probably being a factor, I knew a hotel (or even a motel) inside or outside the Central Manhattan area was going to be impossible! But hey, according to any site I went to, this place was constantly given high marks (especially regarding cleanliness), so how could I refuse?

But what I'm really excited about is the fact that I'll be seeing not one, but two Broadway shows! This is my 4th trip to NY and will be my first, EVER, Broadway experience. So how will I be popping the proverbial cherry? With these two amazing plays:

and

So yes, said cherry will be popped by none other than Daniel Radcliff As "Equus" will be the first of the two I will be seeing... AND, not only is it my first play, but I shall be sitting ON THE STAGE. Yuppers! They have that option... and my seat, while not THE best, it's still pretty rad.
And as for "All My Sons", I paid out the ass for my ticket, but it was worth it as I'll be only three rows from the stage and DEAD CENTER

* * *

Man, I feel like I've been writing this for years (actually, 3 hours and 20 minutes to be exact - I kept getting distracted). So I think it's time for me to shut the fuck up and go to bed.

Good night, and good luck. May the force be with you. God speed.
JESS


P.S. - To those two who wrote comments before I was finished... for shame! *flicks both your foreheads* But thanks anyway!