Failed relationship # 1,283
I had been seeing a girl quite briefly under slightly less than ideal circumstances and have, with a surprising degree of disappointment, decided to walk away. She is a bartender at a dive I had been frequenting with a friend over the summer. I had never paid much attention to her because of my infatuation with and concern for another friend of mine who was in a great deal of pain at the time. I had also decided some time ago that it was seldom worth the effort to try and get a word in edgewise over the tall, wealthy, charismatic fucker who accompanied me. However, on occasion, I would stop in for a beer without my friend in tow, and this young lady and I would make with the random small talk. I knew very little about her aside from an incident when she had left the bar with my friend and had been embarrassed when he shot her down (for reasons I won't go into).
At some point, we ended up with each other's numbers and had been talking/texting. She called me one night, adamant that I meet her and some friends at the Expos, where she knew I had once frequented. I agreed, though already exhausted from a long work week. When I arrived, she was waiting outside alone. We were there for a couple of hours, but split when the idiots she had invited along started causing a scene. She told me to follow her to her place, and I kind of scoffed at the idea as she lives about twenty miles away. I live no more than three miles from the Spos, so suggested she follow me home instead.
Apparently, she had initially wanted nothing more than a passionate sexual experience so as to feel something other than the pain and loneliness she has had to endure since her husband left her. She assumed I would be a good candidate based on her assessment that I was a pervert because of previous conversations about strippers and tittie bars. The way she spoke during the act and, predominantly, during post coital "pillow-talk," made me realize there was a hell of a lot more to the girl than my own initial white trash assumption and led to my reluctant, but seemingly immediate affection toward her. (So, yes, I developed a crush on the girl only after having sex with her.) During several conversations throughout the next week and through playfulness and surprising affection on the day of the Rolling Stones show, I have to think she is (or, at least, was) similarly inclined. She made it a point to say how confused and stressed she was due to her husband "fucking with (her) head," and that she could not do anything else (I assumed sexually) until things were settled between them. It was never clear if she meant he was speaking to her, had come back, or she simply was unable to cope with his continued silence.
We texted continuously over the next few days, but had not communicated at all over the weekend, leaving her somewhat startled to see me with my aforementioned friend when arriving to work. With whatever confusion she's facing in regard to her husband coupled with the need/desire to prevent bar-room rumors about us and embarrassment over having gone home with my friend and then accidentally calling me by his name at the Stones show, she was quite panicked by the situation. She was there a good five minutes and had greeted everyone else in the bar before even acknowledging my existence. We spoke only briefly, and my friend and I left soon after.
The next day, I texted her: "You know, I just can't let it rest. I realize I have said and done some really thoughtless and insulting shit damn near every time we've been around one another, and all I can do is promise to try and keep my head out of my ass. That said, I still don't understand the cold shoulder last night."
To which she replied: "Think u text the wrong person but if u did not i told u i cant do anything till things are settled with (husband) sorry did not call you after work pulling a double kind of today"
And, from me: " Nope, right person. Overreacting, maybe, but you kind of freaked me out last night. Is it ok to ask what's up with the hubby?" To which there was no response, and I still haven't managed to get a straight answer.
We have since texted only vague "how are you" small talk, but have not actually spoken.
I feel sorry for the girl. (partly for her lack of proper grammar instruction) I'm sure my neurotic distancing/clinginess isn't exactly helping her situation, either.
I had been seeing a girl quite briefly under slightly less than ideal circumstances and have, with a surprising degree of disappointment, decided to walk away. She is a bartender at a dive I had been frequenting with a friend over the summer. I had never paid much attention to her because of my infatuation with and concern for another friend of mine who was in a great deal of pain at the time. I had also decided some time ago that it was seldom worth the effort to try and get a word in edgewise over the tall, wealthy, charismatic fucker who accompanied me. However, on occasion, I would stop in for a beer without my friend in tow, and this young lady and I would make with the random small talk. I knew very little about her aside from an incident when she had left the bar with my friend and had been embarrassed when he shot her down (for reasons I won't go into).
At some point, we ended up with each other's numbers and had been talking/texting. She called me one night, adamant that I meet her and some friends at the Expos, where she knew I had once frequented. I agreed, though already exhausted from a long work week. When I arrived, she was waiting outside alone. We were there for a couple of hours, but split when the idiots she had invited along started causing a scene. She told me to follow her to her place, and I kind of scoffed at the idea as she lives about twenty miles away. I live no more than three miles from the Spos, so suggested she follow me home instead.
Apparently, she had initially wanted nothing more than a passionate sexual experience so as to feel something other than the pain and loneliness she has had to endure since her husband left her. She assumed I would be a good candidate based on her assessment that I was a pervert because of previous conversations about strippers and tittie bars. The way she spoke during the act and, predominantly, during post coital "pillow-talk," made me realize there was a hell of a lot more to the girl than my own initial white trash assumption and led to my reluctant, but seemingly immediate affection toward her. (So, yes, I developed a crush on the girl only after having sex with her.) During several conversations throughout the next week and through playfulness and surprising affection on the day of the Rolling Stones show, I have to think she is (or, at least, was) similarly inclined. She made it a point to say how confused and stressed she was due to her husband "fucking with (her) head," and that she could not do anything else (I assumed sexually) until things were settled between them. It was never clear if she meant he was speaking to her, had come back, or she simply was unable to cope with his continued silence.
We texted continuously over the next few days, but had not communicated at all over the weekend, leaving her somewhat startled to see me with my aforementioned friend when arriving to work. With whatever confusion she's facing in regard to her husband coupled with the need/desire to prevent bar-room rumors about us and embarrassment over having gone home with my friend and then accidentally calling me by his name at the Stones show, she was quite panicked by the situation. She was there a good five minutes and had greeted everyone else in the bar before even acknowledging my existence. We spoke only briefly, and my friend and I left soon after.
The next day, I texted her: "You know, I just can't let it rest. I realize I have said and done some really thoughtless and insulting shit damn near every time we've been around one another, and all I can do is promise to try and keep my head out of my ass. That said, I still don't understand the cold shoulder last night."
To which she replied: "Think u text the wrong person but if u did not i told u i cant do anything till things are settled with (husband) sorry did not call you after work pulling a double kind of today"
And, from me: " Nope, right person. Overreacting, maybe, but you kind of freaked me out last night. Is it ok to ask what's up with the hubby?" To which there was no response, and I still haven't managed to get a straight answer.
We have since texted only vague "how are you" small talk, but have not actually spoken.
I feel sorry for the girl. (partly for her lack of proper grammar instruction) I'm sure my neurotic distancing/clinginess isn't exactly helping her situation, either.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
brandi77:
No, the weird Al dream wasn't dirty, it was a fun dream. He had a really big head though.
annalee:
Ugh, sounds too complicated, people are so so complicated. Im glad you liked the picture of me and the little cat you left on my journal