elsie_caruso

Hello everyone! Just wanted to discuss one of my current issues. My struggle has always come from a few sides, from the gay community, i always felt like if i had a boyfriend then i wasn't gay enough for them. and if i was with women that i would be looped into this katy perry kissed a girl society.. i would just love to meet some other people who understand what it is to love both women and men, not just sexually, but mentally and deeply. The other side of the world I have to deal with is the part that I was raised Christian and my father is a minister. My family has strong feelings of hate for gays, even though they say its "hate for the sin" which is just as infurirating. a few months ago i started dating a man and ever since found myself not worried about coming out because i am in no way trying to rush the infuriating feelings i get from the gay and anti gay communities, when i am in a "hetero" relationship. But my feelings still stand. I still have loved and will always love women. I am and will always be sexually attracted to them and find myself much more a lesbian then a straight woman (as if there is some kind of spectrum). I guess what i am saying is i would LOVE to have some friends who know what any of this means, or have ever struggled with these feellings, be they male or female. because we need to start our OWN community. it just upsets me when i am told i am "going through a phase." this phase has lasted since i was 12, and i am 26 so get used to it people. I would also love to meet other people who feel somewhat of a difficulty having a straight partner and their lack of understanding for their sexuality. It also drives me in sane when we are grouped into some kind of fetish. I am not here to fuck women TO TURN MEN ON. I am not here to fufill all of your favorite straight man threesome fantasies. ugh. ok. vented. feeling better.