elphie

I was talking to a friend once... he confessed that there were two people in his life that no matter how much they ever fucked him over... if they came up to his door and said they wanted him to run off with them.. he would drop everything and do it.

Everyone has someone like that in their life... someone they've knwon forever... and no matter what that person always holds a piece of their heart.

I've no mine since I was 13... 6 motnhs ago he told me he was getting married and joining the army then he hung up... I didnt get to sya a single word... I was furiouse... I still am... it's a horrible way to tell one of your best friends that your leaving.. no matter what the reason is.

For all I knew he was dead.. but somewhere in my mind I figured he was lying... I assumed he was pissed because I refused to leave Camron to be with him.

After everything that happened with Camron happened the only person I wanted to talk to was Allan... and I couldn't find him anywhere.. he had really vanished... for awhile I htougth maybe he had died... and swor eif he hadn;t Id hunt him down and make sure he wasn't happy about being alive.

Its been six months... I just got word form the ass... he really did join the army.

He really did get married.

I think I'm in shock right now... I think part of my heart always thought that he'd pine over me... I mean he has for seven years.. I've always known that he would be there for me when I was ready... and now he isn't. I'm happy for him... but sad at the same time... I know thats horribly selfish...

He and I made a promise last year at my birthday... it was his idea. He made me promise that in a year we would see where each of us was... and if we were happy... and that if we wernt both completly happy we would leave whoever we were with and be with one another.

*smiles softly*

I hope he's happy... completly and truly.