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electric

last known address: medium sized yellow sun, small blue planet, milky way galaxy

SG Since 2005

Followers 1283 Following 982

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Wednesday Jul 16, 2008

Jul 15, 2008
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summer.

summer here is unbelievably spectacularly beautiful.
its also very frenzied because it is so short and yet so amazing.
i do enjoy it so.
this seems ironic to me that i would enjoy sunshine (albeit in very small doses)
because i am such a creature of the night. i do though.
but on the other hand i sometimes feel obligated to
be doing something amazing every moment in summer
because it is so short and gorgeous.
the pressure gets to me sometimes!
i want to relax and not feel the pressure all
the time to make the most of it, y'know?

as for news--i have been absurdly busy.
i got my drivers liscense finally (i turn 38 on thursday--shhh!).
this is something of a small accomplishment for me because gentle
reader, i never wanted a driver liscense or for that matter, a car.
so why go to the trouble to learn to drive then you might ask?
ah yes. well--i wanted to be legal and legit for riding the motorcycle.
here in washington, i *must* have a drivers liscense first.
blah.

it has taken me a year to do this, driving other peoples cars.
i could write a mini novella about my experiences with cars
and the dmv but i will spare us both.
really not that interesting.
suffice to say, at long last it is completed and i shall never have to do this again.
phew!

in other aspects of my life i am reasonably happy if not a little ornery lately.
it seems i have *some* mysterious force with in me that simply has to be contrary
and do things that people arent expecting or necessarily wanting me to do.
i hate being fenced in maybe.
im not sure what it is exactly.
i will just leave it at that.

then there is also the fact that as of late i have been booked solid for a week for social obligations.
i dislike being intensely busy so this doesnt please me.
i like to have time to contemplate and be quiet.
during this time, i also think up new ideas for paintings
and paint them. not being able to makes me cranky.

its not even that its because im an introvert, although that is certainly part of it.
i think honestly its just because i am not that interested in what others are doing in a way.
that makes it sound more unfriendly than it is but im not sure how else to phrase it.
the reality is that many many more people are attracted to me than i could possibly
ever have time for. and while i do sometimes enjoy outings and such, the rub lies
in the fact that the very thing that attracts so many well meaning people to me
(my artwork, being an international woman of intrigue and such)
is the often times the very things that they would seek to distract me from doing.

does anyone else here have this problem sometimes?
i feel like its something of a cry baby type scenario.
like--oh please, your life is *so* hard.
but i am curious nevertheless.

soon, street legal riding.
at last!

*bounce*

skull
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
nikonphoto80:
I think most people are like that, I think the sun just makes people feel good, I think the body really does need a little bit of it.

My birthday is this Sunday. I'm really sorry I missed your birthday, I suck at life. You know I really did think you were like no older then 25, and would have guessed 23, you look better then most 19 year old girls.

So why did you not want to drive a car, cars can be very fun, my best friend is 24 and she is just now learning to drive, I don't see anything wrong with waiting if you are abele to do so.

Well I think that is good, you have to keep people guessing, keep them on their toes and make sure they know that there are still things they do not know about you.

Well at least you will have lots of new experiences that you can paint about.

Well at least people are interested in you, I find it very hared to make friends (and keep them) and even harder to find a date.

Well no I do not have that problem, if I do not call people or text them then they will not make the first move and I can never get people to hang out with me, I just come home every night and get on SG, I don't even go out on the weekends anymore, I'm a loser.

happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you. happy happy late birthday to you.

Jul 17, 2008
rxdxt:
Happy birthday and congrats on the car! I've had a car since I was 16, but now I don't have one ! (living in London means a car is unnecessary.. Hope you are well.
Jul 18, 2008

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