God-fucking-damn it! The following is me venting; read only if interested. If you want sweetness and light skip to the bottom.
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I visited Mum in the hospital. Turns out tomorrow they're going to amputate her "good" leg. I've been really pissed off because everone's been telling me that they're sorry for ME, they want to know if I'M okay. I know, that's to be expected from MY friends, but how I feel isn't important.
I want them all to understand what this situation really mean: My mom is going to have to learn to walk again.
She has been in constant pain for sixteen years-- when putting her weight on her "good" foot. Now, she's not only going to have to learn to use an artificial limb, but she's going to be in more pain because she'll have to rely on her "bad" one.
She has to sell her house, uproot herself from her VAST community, and move closer to Portland. She'll have to give up her independence-- not all of it at once, but over time. My mother is not an elderly person. She isn't senile. She's an energetic, bubbly woman with loads of friends, lots to do, and tons more planned.
My mother has also been a beauty all her life, and still would like to get married one day. Now I know having a prosthetic leg wont mean she can't be beautiful or loved-- but let's be honest: the cards are stacking against her. She's had the jab of aging, the horrid surgical scars from years of treatments and now a missing leg-- Oh yeah, some catch! As she said today: If you think I felt sorry for myself before; you haven't seen anything yet.
So, this isn't happening to me. This is her life. I know that she's MY mother, but I want everyone to forget that relationship for a moment. Of course the only reason I care so much is because she's MY mother. If she were someone else's I wouldn't care... but as I said, I'm venting... grrr
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More venting:
I went to work for half the day. My boss still hasn't made up his mind as to who's getting that job. He also hasn't paid the first aid bill-- and we're out of IB Prophen. I had a huge headache. Then my Assistant Manager left the store while the other Asistant Manager was out getting supplies from another store. That left me in charge of the Hillsboro store. I had to help a customer in FedEx, one in the express area, one at the counter, help one co-worker with a refund, print two jobs, all while having the headache and needing to pee!
The woman wanting a refund was a bitch. She was WAY too quick to anger and was massively impatient. None of us knew how to do the refund. My co-worker called the Beaverton store to see if he could get ahold of our Assitant Manager. He finally did and told the customer that the Asistant Manager would be back in in five minutes.
After helping the customer in FedEx, I went to ring-up another customer and the bitch stopped me to ask if I would call the AM again because-- and I quote-- "He said he'd be back in fine minutes and that was six and a half minutes ago.". I told her that he was on route and would be back shortly. She tried to argue with me but I ignored her and helped the other customer. I sooo hate people...
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The none venting part:
Grandma gave me five bucks and bought me a chicken sandwhich. I saw my dad and stepmom before work and got hugs. Brian gave me a copy of one of his zines. Some people are okay.
______________________
I visited Mum in the hospital. Turns out tomorrow they're going to amputate her "good" leg. I've been really pissed off because everone's been telling me that they're sorry for ME, they want to know if I'M okay. I know, that's to be expected from MY friends, but how I feel isn't important.
I want them all to understand what this situation really mean: My mom is going to have to learn to walk again.
She has been in constant pain for sixteen years-- when putting her weight on her "good" foot. Now, she's not only going to have to learn to use an artificial limb, but she's going to be in more pain because she'll have to rely on her "bad" one.
She has to sell her house, uproot herself from her VAST community, and move closer to Portland. She'll have to give up her independence-- not all of it at once, but over time. My mother is not an elderly person. She isn't senile. She's an energetic, bubbly woman with loads of friends, lots to do, and tons more planned.
My mother has also been a beauty all her life, and still would like to get married one day. Now I know having a prosthetic leg wont mean she can't be beautiful or loved-- but let's be honest: the cards are stacking against her. She's had the jab of aging, the horrid surgical scars from years of treatments and now a missing leg-- Oh yeah, some catch! As she said today: If you think I felt sorry for myself before; you haven't seen anything yet.
So, this isn't happening to me. This is her life. I know that she's MY mother, but I want everyone to forget that relationship for a moment. Of course the only reason I care so much is because she's MY mother. If she were someone else's I wouldn't care... but as I said, I'm venting... grrr
______________________
More venting:
I went to work for half the day. My boss still hasn't made up his mind as to who's getting that job. He also hasn't paid the first aid bill-- and we're out of IB Prophen. I had a huge headache. Then my Assistant Manager left the store while the other Asistant Manager was out getting supplies from another store. That left me in charge of the Hillsboro store. I had to help a customer in FedEx, one in the express area, one at the counter, help one co-worker with a refund, print two jobs, all while having the headache and needing to pee!
The woman wanting a refund was a bitch. She was WAY too quick to anger and was massively impatient. None of us knew how to do the refund. My co-worker called the Beaverton store to see if he could get ahold of our Assitant Manager. He finally did and told the customer that the Asistant Manager would be back in in five minutes.
After helping the customer in FedEx, I went to ring-up another customer and the bitch stopped me to ask if I would call the AM again because-- and I quote-- "He said he'd be back in fine minutes and that was six and a half minutes ago.". I told her that he was on route and would be back shortly. She tried to argue with me but I ignored her and helped the other customer. I sooo hate people...
______________________
The none venting part:
Grandma gave me five bucks and bought me a chicken sandwhich. I saw my dad and stepmom before work and got hugs. Brian gave me a copy of one of his zines. Some people are okay.
dovienya:
It may not be zines or sammiches, but: *hugs*