wow i really went overboard last night (I was at a party - see attached photographs)...i forget how low my tolerance is sometimes and i just get carried away, if i don't focus or pay attention to how MUCH i'm drinking it just sort of catches up with me at the worst possible moment. i probably shouldn't have even been drinking but it's almost just a matter of course when i go out with my friends...i mean i would have been the only person in that place not drinking, let's put it that way. it's tough because i feel like i have to remain aware that i have a real unpleasant history with alcohol and certain unsavory tendencies that are never going to go away, but at the same time try and just relax and act like a normal human being. i don't know...
the most important thing is just to keep a good attitude about it all - if i fuck up there's no reason to hurl myself into the pits of despair...all is not lost. that's just my demon talking. all is, to be totally truthful, lost quite less frequently than most people imagine...there aren't a lot of true dead ends in life, at least that's what i've experienced and seen in others, more just points where it's really easy to give up, to look at whatever situation you happen to be in and say "there is nowhere left for me to go, i'm out of options" which when you step back and look at it, is a totally ridiculous statement, but when you're so lost in the moment and in yourself that you can't see the world around you for what it is, that statement seems to have a certain element of truth to it that's hard to deny...
or i could always be full of shit. there is that possibility as well. uuugh...i don't know. all these thoughts, all these wasted words...it's hard to corral them into any kind of a communicatable (i think i just made up a word) order and then you look back at them later and it's like "well was that really worth the effort?" but what the hell else are my other options, you know? and anyway sometimes it works and it's nice.
uhhh what else achewood is the funniest comic ever and Onstad deserves a million more fans than the lady who writes "Cathy" or fucking Jim Davis so check it out
i wonder if anyone is ever going to read this. it's weird, it feels like i'm writing in a vacuum or an enormous echo chamber..."hello -llo -llo -loo....."
the most important thing is just to keep a good attitude about it all - if i fuck up there's no reason to hurl myself into the pits of despair...all is not lost. that's just my demon talking. all is, to be totally truthful, lost quite less frequently than most people imagine...there aren't a lot of true dead ends in life, at least that's what i've experienced and seen in others, more just points where it's really easy to give up, to look at whatever situation you happen to be in and say "there is nowhere left for me to go, i'm out of options" which when you step back and look at it, is a totally ridiculous statement, but when you're so lost in the moment and in yourself that you can't see the world around you for what it is, that statement seems to have a certain element of truth to it that's hard to deny...
or i could always be full of shit. there is that possibility as well. uuugh...i don't know. all these thoughts, all these wasted words...it's hard to corral them into any kind of a communicatable (i think i just made up a word) order and then you look back at them later and it's like "well was that really worth the effort?" but what the hell else are my other options, you know? and anyway sometimes it works and it's nice.
uhhh what else achewood is the funniest comic ever and Onstad deserves a million more fans than the lady who writes "Cathy" or fucking Jim Davis so check it out
i wonder if anyone is ever going to read this. it's weird, it feels like i'm writing in a vacuum or an enormous echo chamber..."hello -llo -llo -loo....."