I need to find myself a religion, something to believe in and hope for. Because my life feels so unreal, like a dream. i need to feel like i own myself, because i don't right now.
i need calm, music, self-control, understanding, and just peace within. its so hard to find. i hate where i am. i hate florida, i cant deny it. it just does not reflect who i am. but my mom is here, and so is my fiancees, and if we left, not only would we leave them here alone, we would deprive any future children we have from a close relationship with them. god dammit, i always focus on everyone else before me. so i am compassionate, but miserable.
i dream of my home surrounded by change, by seasons, snow and fall and spring! and mountains! and people who are not surviving in a world of self-centeredness and are open to each other as human beings. i want the pacific northwest. i plan to leave by 30. i don't want to regret my life.
i need calm, music, self-control, understanding, and just peace within. its so hard to find. i hate where i am. i hate florida, i cant deny it. it just does not reflect who i am. but my mom is here, and so is my fiancees, and if we left, not only would we leave them here alone, we would deprive any future children we have from a close relationship with them. god dammit, i always focus on everyone else before me. so i am compassionate, but miserable.
i dream of my home surrounded by change, by seasons, snow and fall and spring! and mountains! and people who are not surviving in a world of self-centeredness and are open to each other as human beings. i want the pacific northwest. i plan to leave by 30. i don't want to regret my life.
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A lot of the chains are really putting profits before people and it annoys me to see them doing that. The supermarket and mass merchant pharmacies can be better because they've got less volume (they do have a few stores that are the rare exception and can have high volume though) and since they're not running the pharmacy as a profit center they are more reasonable with technician hours. It's something to look into if you haven't already and you're looking to keep practicing.