dree

It's been awhile, I thought I should update and let everyone know that I'm still alive.

I have a final tonight at 6:30, I'm not too stoked on it, but it's my last one and I will be dooooone till next semester! I've developed an I really don't give a shit attitude and that's not really a good thing. I've been really stressed out with work and the whole boy situation (not just my ex now, every boy in general) which has caused my face to break out like crazy, which is stressing me out more. Then with my I don't give a shit attitude I haven't been working out which has made me gain weight and that is not making me happy. So studying has been hard and not really on the top of my list. I'm actually contemplating on skipping my final but I know that's not a smart idea and I will force myself to go..

On the subject of my ex.
On december 1st I had my friend take me to his house so I can give him his stuff back along with the few things I got for him for Christmas. Before we broke up I had been working on a scrapbook for him with pictures of us in it. I stopped after we ended but then last month decided to finish it and then give it to him, to remind him of the memories we've shared.. which are some of my favorites. When I saw him that night I told him that some of what was in the book was inappropriate because I had pictures of us kissing and some had "love" written on them. I left and while in the car about 7 minutes after I left he texts me and this was our conversation.. (Yes, it's sad that I have his texts from that long ago. -_- )

Him: "Ughhhhhh!"
Me: "Whaa?"
Him: "Literally, I didn't even read the stuff in the book and I was smiling super big. Haha. I miss my best friend."
Me: "Hahaha. I'll always be your best friend."
Him: "Haha. If you're lucky...
Me: "Haha, ohh, you're going to defriend me?"
Him: "No. Why would I do a stupid thing like that?"

-more conversation about what we were doing at the time. Just talking-

A few days after that we were talking about how I totaled my last car a few years ago and how I need a new one. I told him something along the lines of how if I crash this car then I need to die and he said noo because then he would be Pooter-less. Poter is a name he's called me for about 4 or 5 years. So, yay, to the fact that he would care if I died? Then this came along..

Him: "Lol, I showed my roommate that scrapbook you made me, and he saw you and was like "holy fuck, what are you thinking not dating her." Haha."
Me: "Hahaha. Yee! ^_^ Made my night."
Him: "Lol whyyyyyy?"
Me: "Cause! It just made meh happeh! Whyyyy you hatin?! lol."
Him: "Hahaha. Alright alright. I'll hook you up with my roommate. :p"
Me: "Only if he's cute."
Him: "Pffffft. Nahhhhht."
Me: "Hahaha. =p Why nawt?"
Him: "Cause. I wouldn't wanna steal you away from him one day. Hahahaha."
Me: "Hahaha, whaaat?"
Him: "Nothing. Haha."

That made me smile, but confused me. Ugh.
Since then we just talk like normal. Blah blah. Tuesday he asked what I was up to and I said about to take finals and he brought up Victoria (the other girl) and was like "It must be finals week at the JC because Victoria has them too." and I just... angry. I don't want to hear about Victoria. He should know this. I have yet to bring up to him that me and her have talked, I'm just waiting for the right time...
I'm trying to distance myself from him. Seem less available to him. I didn't talk to him at all yesterday and I didn't plan on talking to him today. He texted me at around 9:30 this morning just saying "Fagfagfag." and I didn't bother replying to him and I don't plan to. I want to see how long I can go without speaking to him and see how he reacts. I did buy Christmas cards for his mom, dad, and grandparents though so I'm going to have to see him to pass those along to him to give to them.

In other guy news I have been trying to meet new people to get my mind off of my ex. I've been talking to this guy Jonathan from Sacramento and I can already tell that he's a douche bag and that our personalities clash, but he's cute.. and right now, that's good enough for me. Not saying I'm going to kook up with him or anything but just hang out and see where things go. One night I basically told him he was taking me on a date. His mom lives near me so he agreed to take me on a date next time he visits his mom. He was going to come down tuesday to go to lunch with me, but I had finals that day. Now though, I'm reconsidering even talking to him anymore because tuesday night after finals I went to a little get together where I ended up drinking and as soon as Jonathan found out he would text me back faster than usual (he usually takes 30 minutes or even hours to reply back to me) with comments like "Want me to come hide under the covers n kiss your hips.. rub your inner thighs?" and "Let's makeout." and shit like that. I called him out and said "You're only saying these things because I'm drunk." and of coarse he denies it, but I'm smarter than that. He got all butt hurt last night and said "You never send me sexy things. =[" and I never replied and I don't want to. ugh.

Then I was talking to my friend Brian the other day and he was making his usual comments about girls and how he finds them all "retarded" and then told me "Adrienne, you're like the only girl that doesn't have to do anything sexual to mean anything. I really respect you and you actually mean a lot to me. You're like my favorite person, like ever." Which is flattering of him to say but he's really sexist and cheats on his girlfriend all the time and tells me about it, and laughs because he thinks it's funny. So i basically tell him how big of an asshole he is all he time. I said there are some guys out there who don't think about women poorly and he just said "You still tell yourself that?"

just... ah!
I want to shit on every guy's doorstep. I'm so sick of shitty boys.