So currently had a small tummy bug before I had an anxiety issue flare up but after my internship boss who has put reimbursing me on hold again. And sigh I don't know if an emergency came up or what not but I was really counting on being paid back and now I am having mini panic attack and I am not even sure how many Ativan I can take in a time frame. But this holiday season is stressing me out beyond belief my only "work" is this internship. And I used money I didn't have and ugh now I am having sick pains and anxiety pains and I feel like just walking because at this point we were suppose to know if we get w paid position or not. And I kinda need steady pay. I enjoy writing it is my passion. But yes having my name there is a plus but no actual pay makes it hard to stay with a company. Like I believe I her draw and abilities to help and change people but this is hurting me. Like a lot money wise and health wise cause this anxiety and tears only makes the already there stomach bug worse. Like I haven't actually slept yet so I have been awake and uneasy tummy from 8am yesterday to now 4am the next day. Like idk. Anxiety and depression plus that stomach bug is making me its bitch. And it hurts.
