Does anybody know anything about herbal therapy? I think I need some help with getting my energy back.
Long story short, the last few months have been incredibly stressful, both for work and personal reasons, and then over the last 2 weeks I was sick a lot and had that tooth yanked out; I haven't been eating right because of all that and obviously had to stop exercising for a bit.
We are currently out of the woods, but I feel like 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag. I keep losing weight, and I feel weak and lethargic.
I have to get back in the gym this coming week, and I NEED to get some serious energy; the healthy kind, not the Red Bull and Ephedra kind.
Luckily I haven't been drinking or doing anything crazy at all lately (well, except for the Vicodin binge, which doesn't count).
Any advice at all would be appreciated; need advice on energy, libido, alertness, all of it...I really feel strung out.
Yet more...
I think I get the expression "I am so emo my emo hurts" now. My deal is that all of my friends are girls. Seriously, ALL of them. In addition to that, I seem to be the ONE person on this planet that they can talk to. I am the one getting the phone calls at 3 AM. I am THAT guy. The sensitive one. The good-looking, neat, good listening, open, non-judgmental, funny one. Yes, that's me.
He's got money, he drives a nice car, he owns a house, he has a cat, he has trendy hair, he isn't married, all of his friends are girls...
HE MUST BE GAY
lol, wow...seriously, this is ridiculous. Every girl I have met since I moved to Florida has told me her life's story within 36 hours of meeting me; I feel like some sort of naughty priest, it's addicting. It's like a drug...
tell me
it's ok
I'm safe
I'm here
I care
your secrets
your feelings
your lust
you trust me
talk to me...
It's some strange addiction, alright...
The problem is, every once in a while, I get crushed. It's the weight of everybody's emotions crowding out my own.
Then...when I need it...when I need someone to talk to...when I am weak...when I need a savior...there is nobody there.
I am the emotional dumpster, and I am good at it. Everyone needs one, from time to time. I just seem to attract the ones who need it more than normal. Becuse they are that way, though, they don't have the capacity to take it back.
So, when I fall, I fall hard.
I have discovered that without fail the women I end up dating have used me to bandage some part of their soul that was bleeding. They like me strong, confident, secure, nurturing. They like the savior in me.
But when I need a savior...when they know all about me, all my secrets...
Even now. Even now, when I was on the verge of emotional ruin a few short months ago, even now I don't even have to try; the confessions and pleas for emotional mercy and understanding come at 2 AM, over the phone, from women who hardly know me at all. They just know I will listen, that I am here, that I can be trusted, that I do not judge.
It's my therapy, my catharsis. I am on this planet to listen. As long as someone is confessing to me, as long as someone is confiding in me, my purpose is met; I have my direction.
It's my lot to be the rock, I guess, for them to cling to. I just can't need it myself. My foundation must be set in stone. I am the castle, the vault.
It's my aura.
I am the sin eater.
I truthfully don't know if it is good or bad. I don't know now if I will ever get it the other way, where my head can lay in someone else's lap. Whether I can ever count on anybody but myself.
This is how I got into it with the last one I was in love with. I was her rock. I was the one who kept her going. I was the savior. I was there for everything...every need, every tear, every slight. She was the sickest one I had ever met, too...seriously NEEDED to heal, and I helped.
Unfortunately, she was ruined before she ever met me; too much pain and shock and torture had scarred her before our paths crossed. It was hopeless.
I knew it was...but I tried. I was good. Then, she got swept up by someone else, who offered the party, the life, the 'stuff,' the drugs, and she was gone *pfft* like that. An older guy. A salesman. A smooth talker.
That was two months ago. Now, he is getting tired of her already. Asked her to marry him within a month of getting me out of the picture, now he is getting rid of her.
I knew this would happen...she is too broken for him. He doesn't need it; he's been married three times. He knows better.
She is headed for the worst fall, the worst break. She's stuck...she lives with him, she has no job any more, she has nowhere to go. She is going to crash.
I got her out of my life for a reason. I knew this would happen between the two of them; I just couldn't have it be anything to do with me. The love boat has hit an iceberg...it was just a matter of time.
So, now...
I don't know when...but soon
those 3 AM calls will be coming from her again
God help me
anyone else, anyone else, anyone else...
but keep me away from Jenny; she will destroy me this time.
Long story short, the last few months have been incredibly stressful, both for work and personal reasons, and then over the last 2 weeks I was sick a lot and had that tooth yanked out; I haven't been eating right because of all that and obviously had to stop exercising for a bit.
We are currently out of the woods, but I feel like 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag. I keep losing weight, and I feel weak and lethargic.
I have to get back in the gym this coming week, and I NEED to get some serious energy; the healthy kind, not the Red Bull and Ephedra kind.
Luckily I haven't been drinking or doing anything crazy at all lately (well, except for the Vicodin binge, which doesn't count).
Any advice at all would be appreciated; need advice on energy, libido, alertness, all of it...I really feel strung out.
Yet more...
I think I get the expression "I am so emo my emo hurts" now. My deal is that all of my friends are girls. Seriously, ALL of them. In addition to that, I seem to be the ONE person on this planet that they can talk to. I am the one getting the phone calls at 3 AM. I am THAT guy. The sensitive one. The good-looking, neat, good listening, open, non-judgmental, funny one. Yes, that's me.
He's got money, he drives a nice car, he owns a house, he has a cat, he has trendy hair, he isn't married, all of his friends are girls...
HE MUST BE GAY
lol, wow...seriously, this is ridiculous. Every girl I have met since I moved to Florida has told me her life's story within 36 hours of meeting me; I feel like some sort of naughty priest, it's addicting. It's like a drug...
tell me
it's ok
I'm safe
I'm here
I care
your secrets
your feelings
your lust
you trust me
talk to me...
It's some strange addiction, alright...
The problem is, every once in a while, I get crushed. It's the weight of everybody's emotions crowding out my own.
Then...when I need it...when I need someone to talk to...when I am weak...when I need a savior...there is nobody there.
I am the emotional dumpster, and I am good at it. Everyone needs one, from time to time. I just seem to attract the ones who need it more than normal. Becuse they are that way, though, they don't have the capacity to take it back.
So, when I fall, I fall hard.
I have discovered that without fail the women I end up dating have used me to bandage some part of their soul that was bleeding. They like me strong, confident, secure, nurturing. They like the savior in me.
But when I need a savior...when they know all about me, all my secrets...
Even now. Even now, when I was on the verge of emotional ruin a few short months ago, even now I don't even have to try; the confessions and pleas for emotional mercy and understanding come at 2 AM, over the phone, from women who hardly know me at all. They just know I will listen, that I am here, that I can be trusted, that I do not judge.
It's my therapy, my catharsis. I am on this planet to listen. As long as someone is confessing to me, as long as someone is confiding in me, my purpose is met; I have my direction.
It's my lot to be the rock, I guess, for them to cling to. I just can't need it myself. My foundation must be set in stone. I am the castle, the vault.
It's my aura.
I am the sin eater.
I truthfully don't know if it is good or bad. I don't know now if I will ever get it the other way, where my head can lay in someone else's lap. Whether I can ever count on anybody but myself.
This is how I got into it with the last one I was in love with. I was her rock. I was the one who kept her going. I was the savior. I was there for everything...every need, every tear, every slight. She was the sickest one I had ever met, too...seriously NEEDED to heal, and I helped.
Unfortunately, she was ruined before she ever met me; too much pain and shock and torture had scarred her before our paths crossed. It was hopeless.
I knew it was...but I tried. I was good. Then, she got swept up by someone else, who offered the party, the life, the 'stuff,' the drugs, and she was gone *pfft* like that. An older guy. A salesman. A smooth talker.
That was two months ago. Now, he is getting tired of her already. Asked her to marry him within a month of getting me out of the picture, now he is getting rid of her.
I knew this would happen...she is too broken for him. He doesn't need it; he's been married three times. He knows better.
She is headed for the worst fall, the worst break. She's stuck...she lives with him, she has no job any more, she has nowhere to go. She is going to crash.
I got her out of my life for a reason. I knew this would happen between the two of them; I just couldn't have it be anything to do with me. The love boat has hit an iceberg...it was just a matter of time.
So, now...
I don't know when...but soon
those 3 AM calls will be coming from her again
God help me
anyone else, anyone else, anyone else...
but keep me away from Jenny; she will destroy me this time.
Since you have been stressed you should be taking extra B vitamins. that is needed when you are in more stress. you can get 'stress tabs' at health stores. Make sure you eat a bit more well rounded. I tend to forget to have some type of protein in my diet and it hits me harder since I have lower energy levels at times with the lower heart rate and all that jazz. but if you have a part of the day that you feel like you bottom out then keep something with you like nuts or an energy bar or something like that. That is all I could tell from what you described in your journal.
no, I don't know anything as I am a fan of redbull and ephedra myself...
as far as the rest of the stuff goes, if you really want to avoid it, you can.