I am very happy to say that I found a new text editor to work with when I am writing. I had always before just used Open Office (which is a great Windows Office clone...if you pirate Word or Excel or Power Point you don't have to. Open Office is free at OpenOffice.org), but I had always wanted to be able to work with a text editor that is a black screen with green text, kind of like an old terminal. I want to be able to just see the screen and my words, and no toolbars or bullshit. No distractions. I found this program called Dark Room that does exactly what I want it to do...this way I can type all I want on a black screen and just do editing or what have you in Open Office. I'm typing on it right now; it's pretty fantastic. I haven't been able to find a font that looks like an old terminal font would look, but that's OK. I can get around to that later.
When I sit at the coffee shop and I...blog...people look at my computer and my screen all the time. At least with this text editor, my screen will look very mysterious. I think I can set the color of the text to red, but that's just asking for drama. I don't want people looking too close. With green text, people think it's some type of programming document, and they don't want to really look to close because they think their head will explode. With red, well...people will just think you are a Satanist.
I was having a coversation this evening with a friend of mine in Miami who feels that Myspace is full of oversexed people. It is, to be sure; however, it is worse for her because she is in Miami and is looking at people in Miami. Miami is full of douchebags. I can't say this enough, and I will say it again:
Miami is full of douchebags.
There is an additional factor with the Miami Myspacians that is in fact extant in the remainder of the Myspace...blogosphere...*shudder*, however, the saturation factor in the Miami area of this factor is almost 100%. I am talking about the kissyface photos.
If there is one thing that a person can do that will make him or her look like a douchebag more than anything else, it's making the kissyface. This applies to men and women both. Seriously, it looks stupid. Or, as my friend from Boston says, RETAAAHDED. It's a fact, the kissyface is actually not cool, sexy, or in any way advantageous.
Now, there are other stupid facial expressions that have come into vogue with the social networking power of phonecams and the internet. For instance, the top-down shot where a girl takes her phone, holds it above her head, and looks up wearing a low cut shirt. This accentuates big boobs and hides the fact that the girl is a hambeast. I don't care if you're fat; hell I used to be fat, too. Trust me, though, there isn't enough camouflage in the world to hide it...just own it and rock it.
There is the straight on face shot with the eyes looking to the side. This shot can be found on every girl's okcupid. This is more effective with glasses, and is in fact generally a glasses-showcase shot; as in: "hey look at my big glasses!" This one isn't too bad, it's just used a lot. It often posed with the mouth open in an open jawed smile, as if one was suddenly surprised by a birthday cake full of kittens and rainbows. That happens a lot, so I know exactly what that cake would make your face do if you saw it.
There is the driving photo. This one is always taken while driving. Boobs are pushed out, chin is slightly tucked, camera is held out to the side, mouth is slightly open, and eyes are averted from the road and toward the camera quite dramatically. This one isn't bad, but people try way too hard to look sexy for photos while driving. It is incongruous. It's like insisting on free range chicken in your McNuggets...it won't make any difference.
There is the squint in the sunlight photo. This always is a bad shot. It's not fake or anything, it's just not artistic. It can only ever be used as a record of the person being in a particular place and maybe also at a particular time. In other words, it's an "evidence" shot.
Which brings me to the next category: passed out drunk. This one actually is hilarious 100% of the time. It is the football-to-the-groin of the social network photos. If you need to worry about drunk photos on the internet because of your job, you probably need to either quit the job or stop getting drunk. The drunk photo is a winner. Bonus if there is vomit, marker, or any shaving pictured.
The kissyface, though...good lord. If you are in Miami and a camera gets whipped out, every person in a 20 foot radius makes that face, It's like cameras release a cloud of alum which puckers every pair of lips in sight. It really is quite alarming once you start to notice it...it's on my list of things that really are quite alarming when you start to notice them. You haven't seen this list? Well then, let me tell you a few of the things on the list:
1. Kissyface. We've been through this already.
2. Brett Favre takes off his chinstrap after every play. EVERY PLAY.
3. Stuttering has become popular on talk television programs among people wishing to effect a "folksy" vibe.
4. This one is about to get knocked off because the inauguration is over: "vetting" doesn't me what you think it means.
That's all for now, I think...the Triazolam is starting to kick in. I'd better shut 'er down for the night.
When I sit at the coffee shop and I...blog...people look at my computer and my screen all the time. At least with this text editor, my screen will look very mysterious. I think I can set the color of the text to red, but that's just asking for drama. I don't want people looking too close. With green text, people think it's some type of programming document, and they don't want to really look to close because they think their head will explode. With red, well...people will just think you are a Satanist.
I was having a coversation this evening with a friend of mine in Miami who feels that Myspace is full of oversexed people. It is, to be sure; however, it is worse for her because she is in Miami and is looking at people in Miami. Miami is full of douchebags. I can't say this enough, and I will say it again:
Miami is full of douchebags.
There is an additional factor with the Miami Myspacians that is in fact extant in the remainder of the Myspace...blogosphere...*shudder*, however, the saturation factor in the Miami area of this factor is almost 100%. I am talking about the kissyface photos.
If there is one thing that a person can do that will make him or her look like a douchebag more than anything else, it's making the kissyface. This applies to men and women both. Seriously, it looks stupid. Or, as my friend from Boston says, RETAAAHDED. It's a fact, the kissyface is actually not cool, sexy, or in any way advantageous.
Now, there are other stupid facial expressions that have come into vogue with the social networking power of phonecams and the internet. For instance, the top-down shot where a girl takes her phone, holds it above her head, and looks up wearing a low cut shirt. This accentuates big boobs and hides the fact that the girl is a hambeast. I don't care if you're fat; hell I used to be fat, too. Trust me, though, there isn't enough camouflage in the world to hide it...just own it and rock it.
There is the straight on face shot with the eyes looking to the side. This shot can be found on every girl's okcupid. This is more effective with glasses, and is in fact generally a glasses-showcase shot; as in: "hey look at my big glasses!" This one isn't too bad, it's just used a lot. It often posed with the mouth open in an open jawed smile, as if one was suddenly surprised by a birthday cake full of kittens and rainbows. That happens a lot, so I know exactly what that cake would make your face do if you saw it.
There is the driving photo. This one is always taken while driving. Boobs are pushed out, chin is slightly tucked, camera is held out to the side, mouth is slightly open, and eyes are averted from the road and toward the camera quite dramatically. This one isn't bad, but people try way too hard to look sexy for photos while driving. It is incongruous. It's like insisting on free range chicken in your McNuggets...it won't make any difference.
There is the squint in the sunlight photo. This always is a bad shot. It's not fake or anything, it's just not artistic. It can only ever be used as a record of the person being in a particular place and maybe also at a particular time. In other words, it's an "evidence" shot.
Which brings me to the next category: passed out drunk. This one actually is hilarious 100% of the time. It is the football-to-the-groin of the social network photos. If you need to worry about drunk photos on the internet because of your job, you probably need to either quit the job or stop getting drunk. The drunk photo is a winner. Bonus if there is vomit, marker, or any shaving pictured.
The kissyface, though...good lord. If you are in Miami and a camera gets whipped out, every person in a 20 foot radius makes that face, It's like cameras release a cloud of alum which puckers every pair of lips in sight. It really is quite alarming once you start to notice it...it's on my list of things that really are quite alarming when you start to notice them. You haven't seen this list? Well then, let me tell you a few of the things on the list:
1. Kissyface. We've been through this already.
2. Brett Favre takes off his chinstrap after every play. EVERY PLAY.
3. Stuttering has become popular on talk television programs among people wishing to effect a "folksy" vibe.
4. This one is about to get knocked off because the inauguration is over: "vetting" doesn't me what you think it means.
That's all for now, I think...the Triazolam is starting to kick in. I'd better shut 'er down for the night.