Who knew it was that easy to forget who you are?
My name is Shawn Arends. Over the past 3 years I have been known as Cheddarr McBoohawk. Harmless Nickname? I wish.
Cheddarr started to take over my mind. I would no longer reply to the name 'Shawn', in fact, people calling me that would anger me. I started to heavily drink, I started disrespecting my friends and other around me, and just became someone who was not fun to be around.
Now, you are probably thinking "this guy is just using Cheddarr as an excuse." Well, I have no way to prove you wrong. Maybe somewhere deep in my subconscious I was using Cheddarr as an excuse, but that is besides the point.
Moving on, Cheddarr McBoohawk basically became all the bad qualities of Shawn Arends. I would only be one or the other; Cheddarr McBoohawk, a cocky, arrogant asshole, or Shawn Arends, all around nice guy and a pleasure to be around. There was no median, it was one or the other. I lost a lot of friends becuase hanging out with me started to become a gamble on who I would be at that particular time. This continued for 3 years.
3 days ago I woke up and asked myself 'Who am I'
Am I Cheddarr McBoohawk?
Am I Shawn Arends?
The answer was, I was both.
It was then and there that I learned that Cheddarr McBoohawk is a part of me, and will always be a part of me, but to err is human, and I shouldn't create an alias to cover up my bad qualities. They aren't a bad thing to have, they just define you more as a person.
So Cheddarr McBoohawk is gone, now only Shawn Arends remains, accepting that fact that Cheddarr McBoohawk is part of him, and finding no need to use his name to cover up who I really am.
Yeah... For those of you who actually bothered to read this.. Wow! You are amazing! I just had the urge to write about the changes I have been through in the last 3 days lol.
Much Love everyone!
-=Shawn Arends=-
My name is Shawn Arends. Over the past 3 years I have been known as Cheddarr McBoohawk. Harmless Nickname? I wish.
Cheddarr started to take over my mind. I would no longer reply to the name 'Shawn', in fact, people calling me that would anger me. I started to heavily drink, I started disrespecting my friends and other around me, and just became someone who was not fun to be around.
Now, you are probably thinking "this guy is just using Cheddarr as an excuse." Well, I have no way to prove you wrong. Maybe somewhere deep in my subconscious I was using Cheddarr as an excuse, but that is besides the point.
Moving on, Cheddarr McBoohawk basically became all the bad qualities of Shawn Arends. I would only be one or the other; Cheddarr McBoohawk, a cocky, arrogant asshole, or Shawn Arends, all around nice guy and a pleasure to be around. There was no median, it was one or the other. I lost a lot of friends becuase hanging out with me started to become a gamble on who I would be at that particular time. This continued for 3 years.
3 days ago I woke up and asked myself 'Who am I'
Am I Cheddarr McBoohawk?
Am I Shawn Arends?
The answer was, I was both.
It was then and there that I learned that Cheddarr McBoohawk is a part of me, and will always be a part of me, but to err is human, and I shouldn't create an alias to cover up my bad qualities. They aren't a bad thing to have, they just define you more as a person.
So Cheddarr McBoohawk is gone, now only Shawn Arends remains, accepting that fact that Cheddarr McBoohawk is part of him, and finding no need to use his name to cover up who I really am.
Yeah... For those of you who actually bothered to read this.. Wow! You are amazing! I just had the urge to write about the changes I have been through in the last 3 days lol.
Much Love everyone!
-=Shawn Arends=-