In less than 48 hours I will be "confronting" my ex gf at my friends daughters 1st birthday party. The situation is, as it stands now, that I am very pissed off at her and have legitimate reasons for being that way. I do not want to create a scene or have a public arguement at this party. I do want to be true to myself and not pretend to get along with someone that I am mad at. Lastly, I have come to the conclusion that despite wanting it to be better, my friendship with him is not what it was. I have not been honest with myself about how unconcerned he is about some important events in my life. Particurlarly the very fake sounding comments of concern about my father being in the hospital but there are many other things in addition to this which bring me to this conclusion.
It may come down to me deciding that either his wife can be friends with my ex or he can be friends with me. I should point out that my exgf didnt know them until I took her to meet them. I should also mention that at my gf's birthday party in January, they went, but we had just broken up and was really upset. As I'm putting all the pieces together, it seems that I am bending, bending, bending to be flexible for them and its not reciprocated. They are not empathethic or altruistic. I have bent over backwards to be accomodating about the baby but I think I have gone to far. Its time to pull back.
There is a chance that my exgf could bring someone she is dating and if I had reacted negatively I feel that people would be against me.
My sister is one of the few that I can trust to give advice on this and she suggested give a heavy dose of sarcasm to my exgf. Its something that I can do well when I let myself. I can even find ways to do it so that no one but me really knows what I mean. For example if her date's name is Tim, then I could say" its nice to meet you Tina", "Would you like anything else to drink Tonya", "What kind of work do you do Theresa?"
Anyway its for my friend of 25 years and I have every right to be there and she won't make me avoid it for her.
It may come down to me deciding that either his wife can be friends with my ex or he can be friends with me. I should point out that my exgf didnt know them until I took her to meet them. I should also mention that at my gf's birthday party in January, they went, but we had just broken up and was really upset. As I'm putting all the pieces together, it seems that I am bending, bending, bending to be flexible for them and its not reciprocated. They are not empathethic or altruistic. I have bent over backwards to be accomodating about the baby but I think I have gone to far. Its time to pull back.
There is a chance that my exgf could bring someone she is dating and if I had reacted negatively I feel that people would be against me.
My sister is one of the few that I can trust to give advice on this and she suggested give a heavy dose of sarcasm to my exgf. Its something that I can do well when I let myself. I can even find ways to do it so that no one but me really knows what I mean. For example if her date's name is Tim, then I could say" its nice to meet you Tina", "Would you like anything else to drink Tonya", "What kind of work do you do Theresa?"
Anyway its for my friend of 25 years and I have every right to be there and she won't make me avoid it for her.