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dollbabyamy

I was born in Baltimore, but finally, Lebanon, TN is home.

Member Since 2004

Followers 48 Following 29

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Friday Jul 08, 2005

Jul 8, 2005
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Thank you all for the heartfelt, touching messages you left me over the last few days.

It's been a really hard time for both JP and me, and we both read the messages you all left. I'd like to leave you each a personal thank you, but I'm afraid I'd leave someone out...and really, a simple "thank you" just doesn't feel like it's enough. I can't begin to express the comfort we took from the sympathy you all provided.

We buried Dax in JP's sister's backyard, next to their dog, Mojo. We wrapped him in his blanket, curled up on his pillow with his smoochy poochy right under his paws. He was surrounded by his toys and puppy treats. We cried. Soft, silent tears, as we didn't want to further alarm JP's nephew, who is only 3. He was already distraught enough, because he had met Dax, and is old enough to ask many questions about why Dax was sick, and where did he go...some of them made us more upset, but we hid it well. We spent a few minutes alone with him, petting him for the last time, and telling him what a good, strong boy he was and how we'll never forget him, and then we left him to his final resting place. He's not hurting anymore and he's not sick, so we find comfort in knowing that. He was just too little to pull through (the vet said he thought Dax was just 5 or 6 weeks old). He tried and Dax fought...he was meant to be with us, but only for a short time.

JP broke down once we got home...big, heaving sobs that he had been trying to hide from Thai, his sister, and me. We got out the digital camera and looked at pictures of Dax and laid on the bed with Alley, and got it out of our systems. He really just needed to be comforted, and I needed it, too. The vet's assistant made us a clay imprint of Dax's paw, and I'm going to get it mounted in a frame with pictures of him, so we have a nice, lasting memento of his impact on us. I think he was with us to prove that we are good parents, and to prove that we really do have a future.

We can't get another puppy for six months, to make sure the parvo is completely gone from our things. That's fine, because we don't want another puppy right now, anyway. We decided against another chocolate lab...it just wouldn't be Dax, and that's what we'd be expecting. We think we want a yellow lab, this time. Or perhaps a Chesapeake bay retriever. Either way, it will be our Christmas present to each other.

JP told his sister how he wanted to marry me, and when he was thinking about proposing. It looks like I'll be getting engaged shortly after graduating, and the wedding will be sometime in the year following the proposal. I am slated to graduate in May. Hopefully, I can. I will do whatever it takes. Not only am I tiring of college, I am just so ready to move on to the next chapter of my life.

I got the job at Target. I'm supposed to start in September. I went into work yesterday, fully intending to walk right back out if someone...anyone...gave me any problems about calling out of work on Tuesday and Wednesday because of Dax. Fortunately, no one did. I did, however, remove myself from the only full time position in my department. I just need so many days off in the next few months that it would be pointless for me to be full time, because I wont' be working the hours. The insurance is too expensive for me to afford, and I don't qualify for vacation time for a year, and I won't be there that long. So, I figure, instead of being selfish, give it to someone else. I think it made my boss sad, he likes having me work a lot.

JP's sister is having her baby Monday. His other sister is due anytime in the next 2 weeks. Yay for babies. smile SamanthaKayne is also due anytime now, too, with baby Sophia. smile

I watched I heart Huckabees the other day, among other movies...the sex scene was a little much, but overall, most of the movie was pretty funny. Movie Gallery was having a "Buy 2, Get 2 Free" previously viewed DVD special that JP and I took advantage of. It's good, seeing that I'll be having more days off now and more time to watch our gazillion movies.


That's all I've got, for now, SG. I'm still down, still a little depressed...but getting better. Thank you all for being here for me. smile
VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
domnicella:
Yeah I tend to jump to conclusions.
Just the impression I got. He was sorta inebriated and stressed out when we last talked. With time I suppose, things might change for the better. I hope so.
And thanks for the words. smile
Jul 9, 2005
delirium_faerie:
*hugs*
Jul 9, 2005

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