dollbabyamy

Sorry guys, I've been a horrid friend lately...but I've been busy furthering my knowledge of this certain police officer who is beginning to take up considerable and wonderful portions of my existence.
Things are going better than I could have ever dreamed. I've been treated so badly for so long, even the tiniest gestures he makes are welcomed with surprise. He treats me so incredibly well.
The dinner on Sunday went so great. Everything turned out perfect, with the exception of the rolls because, uh, we got a little distracted...*ahem* and they were left in the oven a little longer than the allotted time.
The culmination of Sunday was a breathless "Are you sure you have to go home?" uttered at his truck while we tried to say good bye. We then spent the night getting to know one another in a completely new way, which not only took my breath away but left me without words. Until tonight, when his 3 day stretch of work began, we had not been apart for longer than I was at work. And I, the usual light sleeper, the one used to sleeping so alone that sleep when another person is around is virtually impossible, slept like a baby, wrapped up tightly in his arms. I wake up to him, watching me sleep...to "Good morning, my sweet dollbaby." I fall asleep to him, singing to me, or holding me, whispering "I hope this never ends, my sweetheart." *sigh*

Last night he whispered that he hoped this never ends. I hope it doesn't, either.
It didn't take long for me at all to get used to being this happy.

Also, in the last few days, I've discovered a strange, interesting, and comforting coincidence of sorts. Background: My grandfather died when I was 7. He was and still is one of the most important and valuable influences in my life. Even in my adult life, I still recall things he taught me or said to me. I always told my mom I was going to marry someone like him, because I was so comforted by the way he looked, and spoke, and acted, and treated me. He was a big, tough Marine with a heart of gold...deep, commanding, authoritative voice, broad shoulders, tall...smart, funny, full of good advice (even for a seven year old). My cop is the same build. Same stature...same deep, commanding voice. Same kind of love of music, same sense of humor, same sarcastic wit, same intellect. I had been thinking it was kind of crazy, the comparisons I could make. They even call me by the same two nicknames (dollbaby/babydoll)...and the true straw that broke the camel's back came when I learned they even share the same birthday. How weird is that? My grandmother seems to think, religious woman that she is, that God sent my cop to me because he was like my grandad. I'm not sure about all that, but it is definitely a wild coincidental thing.

Also, in the last few days...I managed to close a few chapters in the book of my life. Finally. Saturday night, while my man was out saving our wonderful city, I went to Hurricane's, a club downtown in Nashville, with a girlfriend of mine. I didn't really want to go, because earlier in the evening Mr. Q called to inform me he was going to Hurricane's and I needed to come out, so we could finally "have our night together". But, I went anyway, because my girl friend wanted me to, and I wanted something to do. I find Mr. Q pretty early in the evening, and he buys me a drink, and we dance, etc. etc. The whole time, I'm thinking about my cop. I can't continue to do what I do with Mr. Q....not now. I've finally found someone who I could seriously see myself with forever, and I'm not jeopardizing that for anyone...this is all going through my head. When we decide to leave, he pulls me close and tells me he's going to call when he comes back to Lebanon, so we can meet up. I moved very close to him, and whispered "I won't answer when you call, so you may not want to waste your time." He said, "Surely that fucking cop doesn't mean that much to you." I pulled back from him for a minute, and looked into his eyes...and I finally saw what I meant to him. Nothing. I was property...property that was stolen from him by a far worthier opponent, and he was pissed. Not because he lost ME, but because he lost what he thought belonged to him. I whispered to him "My fucking cop means more to me after just a few days than I've ever meant to you" and walked away. Chapter closed.
On Monday, my ex from school called me. I had missed class and he wanted to know where I had been. I told him that even though it was hardly his business, I was with my cop, and we were sleeping. He mumbled something about how he couldn't believe I let a goddamn cop spend the night with me, then asks, "So I suppose you're fucking him now, huh?" I said, "That's definitely none of your goddamn business, but since you must know, yes, I am." His response? "I can't fucking believe you are giving MY pussy away to a motherfucking cop!" Excuse me? Property, again. I said "I haven't been yours in years. I wasn't going to be yours again because you were never mine." Chapter closed, even though he still calls and complains about the fact that my cop is a cop.
Even though these were two hard lessons to come to learn, they are two lessons that I definitely needed closure for, in order to move on to a more wonderful relationship with my cop. I knew that, and I'm glad they happened within such a relatively short period. And my cop knows all the gory details of both situations, and he has been understanding beyond compare.

I can't think of anything more I could possibly want than to be with him. I am head over heels, and the best thing in the world is he has fallen right along with me.

Love you all!!!