so, i go down to the casino to play cards. sometimes i win, most times i lose. i enjoy playing, but sometimes you learn lessons the hard way. linlin calls me up and i tell her i am chiiling and that i am fine, which was only partly true. i was playing and i was bored. i feel bad (and i rightfuly should) for not being straight forward with her. i you read this, again i say, i am sorry.
while i more than quadrupled my money, there are things to be learned:
i made a date to go with my friends, and i didnt go. honestly i didnt want to drive that far, but everyone knows i love wine...and i jump at the chance to drink some. i feel bad for not going, but i dont think they mind. it just doesnt feel right without lin around. she makes everything we do together fun. i felt bad that i could drink and she couldn't. i offered to stay sober, but she said no. i am not sure why...
no amount of money or winnings is worth my wife. period. i swear on all that is holy and true that not only would i take a bullet for her gladly, but that i wouldnt sell her for any ammount of money. i know it is little consolation, but it is the truth. i get nervous about making her mad because i know she is kinda hormonal, and i lied. its not ever a good thing to do. i dont feel right unless i run everything through her. sometimes, that comes back to bite me on the butt, but i feel better doing it.
i am actually good at poker, but not as good as i would like to be and definetly not good enough to make a career out of it. college and the army is where it is at. i can learn, get a better job, AND provide for the family. if i cant do my part, what good am i? i am sure the wife would still love me, but trust me, it is the right thing to do.
all in all, i had a little fun, but i also felt bad. my buddie across from me made at least 2 grand. he is far and away better than me and he always offers me tips. i owe him a dinner of his choice for that advise.
one last thing, i still am haveing problems with geting my mind right and i need each of you to pray for me. i am trying to quit smoking for good, as well as some of my smaller bad habits. please pray for me. please. try not to judge...just pray.
let me leave you with a mantra of mine that has fulfilled my inner being for quite some time:
"nothing in this world is worth anything if you do not have anyone to share it with"
(you all may not agree, but it has worked for me. this saying also covers sharing with others you do not know, and giving in general.)
while i more than quadrupled my money, there are things to be learned:
i made a date to go with my friends, and i didnt go. honestly i didnt want to drive that far, but everyone knows i love wine...and i jump at the chance to drink some. i feel bad for not going, but i dont think they mind. it just doesnt feel right without lin around. she makes everything we do together fun. i felt bad that i could drink and she couldn't. i offered to stay sober, but she said no. i am not sure why...
no amount of money or winnings is worth my wife. period. i swear on all that is holy and true that not only would i take a bullet for her gladly, but that i wouldnt sell her for any ammount of money. i know it is little consolation, but it is the truth. i get nervous about making her mad because i know she is kinda hormonal, and i lied. its not ever a good thing to do. i dont feel right unless i run everything through her. sometimes, that comes back to bite me on the butt, but i feel better doing it.
i am actually good at poker, but not as good as i would like to be and definetly not good enough to make a career out of it. college and the army is where it is at. i can learn, get a better job, AND provide for the family. if i cant do my part, what good am i? i am sure the wife would still love me, but trust me, it is the right thing to do.
all in all, i had a little fun, but i also felt bad. my buddie across from me made at least 2 grand. he is far and away better than me and he always offers me tips. i owe him a dinner of his choice for that advise.
one last thing, i still am haveing problems with geting my mind right and i need each of you to pray for me. i am trying to quit smoking for good, as well as some of my smaller bad habits. please pray for me. please. try not to judge...just pray.
let me leave you with a mantra of mine that has fulfilled my inner being for quite some time:
"nothing in this world is worth anything if you do not have anyone to share it with"
(you all may not agree, but it has worked for me. this saying also covers sharing with others you do not know, and giving in general.)