djlarose

Found a random story going through some old files from when I was in rehab back in Cali. Kinda weird how thoughts change 6 years later or so


Winter rains fell harder then I had ever seen before in my two years here in California. At first the drops pounding against the window seemed quite irritating to me. I was feeling the stress of the upcoming times and any little noise got to me. As my nerves calmed, so did the storm. At least it seemed that way, for all I knew I was just getting to accept it.
A deep breath escaped my lips as I got up and left the comfort of my room to walk through the falling rain to reach my car. Having no real destination in mind I just drove off base and took the 5 south. Not realizing the time, I had wondered why there was hardly any traffic. Most people are usually in bed at 3 A.M. There is no way I could sleep tonight with all of the thoughts penetrating in my mind.
Deeper and deeper I fell into your trance. I never felt my heart rate pick increase or my hands start to sweat. All I could think about were the words you said as you said goodbye one final time. Subconsciously, my grip on the shifting lever tightened. Going through gear after gear, the line on the tachometer touched the red briefly every few seconds as the needle on the speedometer steadily moved up and over the top falling back down the other side.
Biting my teeth together to hold back the scream that danced on the end of tongue, I stared straight out into the open road. Little traffic was left this time of night. I could see nothing but open road for as far as I could see. Glancing down I watched my speed pass 120. The speed fueled my adrenaline to points I hadn't felt in years.
The rain had stopped and the road was dry as I got further south. The faster I went the more speed I wanted. I cursed my car for only being able to reach 130. I hated the fact I only had a four cylinder car.
My chest burned with fury, I wanted to go nowhere so much faster. Coming up on the fork I had to make a choice between the 5 and 805. I pulled the right and stayed on the 5 without slowing an once. There was nothing that was going to get me to let up of gas. Harder and harder I pushed forward, trying to do I don't know what. I just felt like a wasp in a swarm and I needed to escape.
Out of nowhere it seemed like, flashing red lights appeared in my rear view mirror. Even going 130 the cop closed in on me quickly. This never happened in Vermont. The cops there couldn't go over 130 If they wanted to. Faced with a decision that would change my life forever, I let off the gas and started to drift slower downshifting as I went. Suddenly 75 seemed slow enough to get out and walk. Jail might not be so bad I thought. Everything else in my life went to hell tonight anyways with those last few parting words to roll off your lips.
Just as I neared the side of the road your words really hit home. "Fuck this." I said as I put everything I had into the acceleration of my little Lancer. The cop easily kept up as he was mumbling something over his loud speaker. I knew I was outmatched by car. I doubt he could keep up as a driver. Moving into the right hand lanes I weaved in and out of the trucks trying to shake him, but unfortunately he stayed off on the side without traffic choosing to not test himself.
In a matter of minutes there were 3 other cops right next to me. Stuck at 130 I couldn't go any faster. I knew there was no way I could get to the border, they would have it blocked off for sure. My only chance was to stay on the left hand side and make a last second dash across the road and hit an exit leaving them on the highway.
Fearing that I really had nothing to lose I saw my chance. One of the exits by Sea world. I pulled on the wheel hard to the right making a dash for the exit. I could hear my tires screech as they bit into the pavement searching for grip. Everything was working great, I saw where I had to be and I was lined up with the off ramp. Before I could really notice my front end had turned more to the right then I had expected. I turned the wheel the other way to try to straighten out but I couldn't. I never saw the cop that had been next to me that was there when I turned into him sending me sideways at 130.
I never felt the car turn onto its side or any of the 11 times the car rolled over. The Doctors told my parents I probably blacked out from the G-forces before I even felt any pain as my car became more or more mangled as it eventually rolled off the highway.