I'm just sayin,
This has nothing to do with anything, really, but I lost my phone in mexico a couple of weeks ago. I'm a jackass. Yada yada yada. But here's the rub: the damn thing was actually found, and returned to the hotel where I was staying. Now if that isn't a stroke of luck. The hotel called, and they said, "yo, weez gonna send your phone up." Now I'm just pinching myself. My usual jaded, hating mindset only hanging on by fingernails. I'm a pupa, in a fucking chrysalis, about to transform myself into a lover...of humanity.
So I get the DHL package today...wow...they were't pulling my chain....and inside, peanuts of styrofoam (whatever they'll be around for the next 1,000,000 years probably causing cancer in small mammals but whatever small price to pay for my sweet sweet oh heart my phone), a box of...staples? A stapler? What the fuck is this? Oh, it's nothing. No, really...it's...nothing. There's nothing in the fucking box. The bag was torn open and then reclosed, I noticed later, and the box...empty.
Now that's more like it, fuckers!! That's how I like it. Don't be all nice and fucking with my head.
And!
So then I call DHL to say "what's up, bitches, it looks like your driver totally gave my phone the five finger discount, or whatever. They say that unless a package is expressly insured for more, that they only
cover $100. Because I didn't convey the need to buy extra insurance to the hotel in mexico, they might cover $100. Maybe. In all liklihood, more trouble than it's worth. I find more and more these days that business "guarantees" only mean one thing: that they guarantee that anything you try to do to recoup money
from them will be so tedious and painful that even if, in the end, you do get money back from them, you'll regret it and hate the fact that you ever embarked on the process. There is no such thing as honor in business anymore - that was a trait that was decidedly detrimental to future revenue, and was therefore
eliminated.
Whatever I don't care though. So dumb. I'm like the most minimal minute user in the history of the planet. I should get like a rebate check every month for using negative minutes, like someone who has a windmill on their lawn and feeds the energy back into the power grid.
And THAT's funny too, considering I appear to otherwise have a lot to say. But I'll shut up now.
Later.
This has nothing to do with anything, really, but I lost my phone in mexico a couple of weeks ago. I'm a jackass. Yada yada yada. But here's the rub: the damn thing was actually found, and returned to the hotel where I was staying. Now if that isn't a stroke of luck. The hotel called, and they said, "yo, weez gonna send your phone up." Now I'm just pinching myself. My usual jaded, hating mindset only hanging on by fingernails. I'm a pupa, in a fucking chrysalis, about to transform myself into a lover...of humanity.
So I get the DHL package today...wow...they were't pulling my chain....and inside, peanuts of styrofoam (whatever they'll be around for the next 1,000,000 years probably causing cancer in small mammals but whatever small price to pay for my sweet sweet oh heart my phone), a box of...staples? A stapler? What the fuck is this? Oh, it's nothing. No, really...it's...nothing. There's nothing in the fucking box. The bag was torn open and then reclosed, I noticed later, and the box...empty.
Now that's more like it, fuckers!! That's how I like it. Don't be all nice and fucking with my head.
And!
So then I call DHL to say "what's up, bitches, it looks like your driver totally gave my phone the five finger discount, or whatever. They say that unless a package is expressly insured for more, that they only
cover $100. Because I didn't convey the need to buy extra insurance to the hotel in mexico, they might cover $100. Maybe. In all liklihood, more trouble than it's worth. I find more and more these days that business "guarantees" only mean one thing: that they guarantee that anything you try to do to recoup money
from them will be so tedious and painful that even if, in the end, you do get money back from them, you'll regret it and hate the fact that you ever embarked on the process. There is no such thing as honor in business anymore - that was a trait that was decidedly detrimental to future revenue, and was therefore
eliminated.
Whatever I don't care though. So dumb. I'm like the most minimal minute user in the history of the planet. I should get like a rebate check every month for using negative minutes, like someone who has a windmill on their lawn and feeds the energy back into the power grid.
And THAT's funny too, considering I appear to otherwise have a lot to say. But I'll shut up now.
Later.