Sometimes I stop & look back on all the chances in life I was too scared to take. I just can't help but wonder how things would have turned out if I had just had the confidence or just the ability to let myself take a leap.
What if I had been a little more outspoken when I was younger instead of waiting untill I was 20-21? What if I moved away like I wanted to? What if I Had gotten married like I planned? Where would I be if I'd have gotten my shit together & finished school on time like I should have?
It just seems like alot of things & people from my past have been popping up lately. I guess it was about a month ago I ran into one of my ex's while I was in this little place picking up some inscense. I saw her out of the coner of my eye & didn't really recagnize her at first but she kinda smiled & so did I. I got a better look & realized who it was. She had just gotten divorced and had moved back in the area. We just kinda chit chatted for a minute or two & went about what we were doing. She came up behind me & gave me a hug before she left. Cinco de Mayo 2 years ago was the last time I had seen her & she was still married but she was telling me about how she was messin' around on her husband, who used to be my friend until he started messin' around with this girl while we were together.. ,I wanted no part of that mess so I didn't persue it. Anyway for the last couple weeks I can't help but wonder why didn't I get a # or anything.. Then again she didn't ask for mine either. This was a girl who I was in no way hung up on after we split in any way. It just really got me thinking...
With everything that's happened in the last year, year and a half no more sitting back & having to wonder "What if's". No more sitting back & letting chances slip by. I've always been to scared to take chances b/c I was afraid of falling flat on my face. It doesn't matter what it was school, work, relationships, or just anything in life where I had to really take a big chance. Well falling on your face is part of life, if you fall you just pick yourself up and keep going. Nothing is perfect in life, nothing is free. If you sit on the sidelines and play it safe you'll never really know what the game is all about... I've taken chances before & fell on my face, stood up, brushed myself off & limped away but I've also landed on my feet & had some good experiences too..
I've really lost where this was going.. Long story short, the hell with being too afraid to take chances. I can't live the rest of my life afraid to take a chance. So starting now I'm taking those chances....
What if I had been a little more outspoken when I was younger instead of waiting untill I was 20-21? What if I moved away like I wanted to? What if I Had gotten married like I planned? Where would I be if I'd have gotten my shit together & finished school on time like I should have?
It just seems like alot of things & people from my past have been popping up lately. I guess it was about a month ago I ran into one of my ex's while I was in this little place picking up some inscense. I saw her out of the coner of my eye & didn't really recagnize her at first but she kinda smiled & so did I. I got a better look & realized who it was. She had just gotten divorced and had moved back in the area. We just kinda chit chatted for a minute or two & went about what we were doing. She came up behind me & gave me a hug before she left. Cinco de Mayo 2 years ago was the last time I had seen her & she was still married but she was telling me about how she was messin' around on her husband, who used to be my friend until he started messin' around with this girl while we were together.. ,I wanted no part of that mess so I didn't persue it. Anyway for the last couple weeks I can't help but wonder why didn't I get a # or anything.. Then again she didn't ask for mine either. This was a girl who I was in no way hung up on after we split in any way. It just really got me thinking...
With everything that's happened in the last year, year and a half no more sitting back & having to wonder "What if's". No more sitting back & letting chances slip by. I've always been to scared to take chances b/c I was afraid of falling flat on my face. It doesn't matter what it was school, work, relationships, or just anything in life where I had to really take a big chance. Well falling on your face is part of life, if you fall you just pick yourself up and keep going. Nothing is perfect in life, nothing is free. If you sit on the sidelines and play it safe you'll never really know what the game is all about... I've taken chances before & fell on my face, stood up, brushed myself off & limped away but I've also landed on my feet & had some good experiences too..
I've really lost where this was going.. Long story short, the hell with being too afraid to take chances. I can't live the rest of my life afraid to take a chance. So starting now I'm taking those chances....
Good for you, at least you are going to do something about your Hermitness! I wish you the best of luck... now go take a chance!