I am a woman of my word. As promised I have been researching my favourite sexual positions over the last few days, I am now completely and utterly fucking knackered, in a haze of post-orgasmic bliss and walking like John Wayne - the lengths I go to for SG 
Now that's dedication 
I think this might get a bit explicit. Sorry if it shox.
Ok so lets talk about sex......
I can't really do a top ten. I mean all sexual positions are variations of the same, its either man on top, woman on top, from behind, reverse-swivel-front-facing-back-facing-upside down-fucking. You can start and give these positions fancy complicated sounding names like the lasagne or reverse cowgirl but essentially they all boil down to the same basics. So with that in mind I won't bore you with the technicalities and will just advance to the nitty-gritty:
I LIKE BEING ON TOP
Yeah I really do. I am not one of these girls who just lies back and expects the man to thrust and grunt and do all the hard work while I'm thinking about what I'm having for dinner tomorrow - I WANT TO BE AN ACTIVE PARTICIPANT. In my opinion sex is not the activity for passivity. I don't sleep with people that I don't care about (I've never had a one-night stand) and therefore I treat love-making as that - an expression of feeling and emotion for another and the best way I feel I can express that is by being in control to a certain degree. Being on top allows me to do that moreso than the man being there. Don't get me wrong, I love and enjoy missionary as much as the next person and it is an extremely pleasurable, intense and close position but it can make me feel selfish and I'm also always aware that my breasts tend to look bigger and better when I'm not lying on my back.......I'm also a closet dominatrix
and a terrible tease, I like nothing more than to have the man at my mercy!
What I like in bed ultimately depends on my mood. If I'm really randy there's nothing quite like a bit of doggie-style - give it to me from behind, as fast and as hard as possible - but the easy pink is preferable to the hard brown if you catch my drift.....though there's always a time and place for that.....if I wake up and am all sleepy with that good old Sunday morning horn then lets spoon it - this feels amazing especially if it also involves a bit of clitoral stimulation with a finger....it's all about the clit really, bang on there for ages and you're guaranteed results.....nothing quite like very,very deep penetration either, sit in a chair if it gets you there.....
The most distracting of all sexual positions surely must be the 69. No partner can cum because too much is going on to fully concentrate on
a) what you are doing and
b) what's being done to you.
It can go on for hours and hours......
Oral is magnificent though. I never used to be great fan of receiving it, it can be done so badly and the sound of a man giving it his all down there can sometimes sound a bit like a dog lapping up water from a bowl - this undoubtedly ruins the moment. When it's done properly it makes you see stars. Giving oral can also be extremely satisfying, I don't understand why a lot of women are against giving good old-fashioned blow jobs, and some of those who do suck refuse to swallow - fuck, if you're gonna do something then do it properly! Sure cum isn't the most pleasant texture in the world, it can also be an acquired taste especially if your partner has been on the garlic or curry (or has cheesy cock syndrome) but look at the pleasure you're giving....it's all about give-and-take really.
While I'm on the subject, male genitalia is a bit mental though (I'm sure female parts are also extremely daunting, I have no doubt, we have so many bits to twiddle) and not having a cock makes it difficult for us to know what's best - foreskins make life complicated, do we just pull them back and whale on ahead? Is there a specific technique? It's the same with testes - probably a bit more subjective an issue, with some men you can put an entire ball in your mouth and suck it like a gobstopper - other men you just have to blow on them and they nearly cry, what exactly is the protocol here? I also fear hand jobs, do I grip it like a tennis racket??????? I'm clumsy enough in bed without taking all these factors on board!
It's weird but I have a recurring dream that I actually have male genitalia - a real proper dick. It's so realistic I can almost feel it. I think I'm suffering badly from penis envy, I should just buy myself the biggest car I can find as a major phallic symbol and perhaps this will cure me......
Now that's dedication
I think this might get a bit explicit. Sorry if it shox.
Ok so lets talk about sex......
I can't really do a top ten. I mean all sexual positions are variations of the same, its either man on top, woman on top, from behind, reverse-swivel-front-facing-back-facing-upside down-fucking. You can start and give these positions fancy complicated sounding names like the lasagne or reverse cowgirl but essentially they all boil down to the same basics. So with that in mind I won't bore you with the technicalities and will just advance to the nitty-gritty:
I LIKE BEING ON TOP
Yeah I really do. I am not one of these girls who just lies back and expects the man to thrust and grunt and do all the hard work while I'm thinking about what I'm having for dinner tomorrow - I WANT TO BE AN ACTIVE PARTICIPANT. In my opinion sex is not the activity for passivity. I don't sleep with people that I don't care about (I've never had a one-night stand) and therefore I treat love-making as that - an expression of feeling and emotion for another and the best way I feel I can express that is by being in control to a certain degree. Being on top allows me to do that moreso than the man being there. Don't get me wrong, I love and enjoy missionary as much as the next person and it is an extremely pleasurable, intense and close position but it can make me feel selfish and I'm also always aware that my breasts tend to look bigger and better when I'm not lying on my back.......I'm also a closet dominatrix
and a terrible tease, I like nothing more than to have the man at my mercy!
What I like in bed ultimately depends on my mood. If I'm really randy there's nothing quite like a bit of doggie-style - give it to me from behind, as fast and as hard as possible - but the easy pink is preferable to the hard brown if you catch my drift.....though there's always a time and place for that.....if I wake up and am all sleepy with that good old Sunday morning horn then lets spoon it - this feels amazing especially if it also involves a bit of clitoral stimulation with a finger....it's all about the clit really, bang on there for ages and you're guaranteed results.....nothing quite like very,very deep penetration either, sit in a chair if it gets you there.....
The most distracting of all sexual positions surely must be the 69. No partner can cum because too much is going on to fully concentrate on
a) what you are doing and
b) what's being done to you.
It can go on for hours and hours......
Oral is magnificent though. I never used to be great fan of receiving it, it can be done so badly and the sound of a man giving it his all down there can sometimes sound a bit like a dog lapping up water from a bowl - this undoubtedly ruins the moment. When it's done properly it makes you see stars. Giving oral can also be extremely satisfying, I don't understand why a lot of women are against giving good old-fashioned blow jobs, and some of those who do suck refuse to swallow - fuck, if you're gonna do something then do it properly! Sure cum isn't the most pleasant texture in the world, it can also be an acquired taste especially if your partner has been on the garlic or curry (or has cheesy cock syndrome) but look at the pleasure you're giving....it's all about give-and-take really.
While I'm on the subject, male genitalia is a bit mental though (I'm sure female parts are also extremely daunting, I have no doubt, we have so many bits to twiddle) and not having a cock makes it difficult for us to know what's best - foreskins make life complicated, do we just pull them back and whale on ahead? Is there a specific technique? It's the same with testes - probably a bit more subjective an issue, with some men you can put an entire ball in your mouth and suck it like a gobstopper - other men you just have to blow on them and they nearly cry, what exactly is the protocol here? I also fear hand jobs, do I grip it like a tennis racket??????? I'm clumsy enough in bed without taking all these factors on board!
It's weird but I have a recurring dream that I actually have male genitalia - a real proper dick. It's so realistic I can almost feel it. I think I'm suffering badly from penis envy, I should just buy myself the biggest car I can find as a major phallic symbol and perhaps this will cure me......
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I must know - what is the lasagne?