devil_bitch

I am cross posting this on my Myspace, Yahoo360, and Suicidegirls blogs. So if you have read it already you dont have to again. : )


The definition of resolution is:

-a resolve or determination: to make a firm resolution to do something.
-the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action, method, procedure, etc.
-the mental state or quality of being resolved or resolute; firmness of purpose.




I dont necessarily believe in making New Year's resolutions. Even if technically that is what it is I like to think of them more as life goals or changes. They are the things that I would like to change about myself, to be happier as a person. I like to think of them as life goals becuase I seem to ask for the same things every year. Plus if I don't quite get the hang of it for 2007, at least I wont feel guilty for making the same goals for 2008.

So what is on the menu for 2007.... Well

1. To be more patient and understanding.
2. To not judge others so harshly.
3. To be open to new experiences.
4. To have an open heart and be willing to let love in
5. Most importantly, to be smarter with money and finances.

I have a lot of hopes for the new year. 2006 brought me the devasting loss of my mother and the joy of having my heart render to shreds. It left me feeling hurt, lost, and with a lot of anger and bitterness. I feel like I missed most of the year. OK I did miss most of the year.

I plan to spend a lot more time with my friends than I have been. At some point I need to make ammends with my family but I am just not ready to do that. This is where the not judging others, patience, and understanding comes in. I may not like some things that they have done but they are the only blood family that I have left.

I hope that by making these changes in myself,it will get me to where I need to be spiritually. All enlightenment begins from within and we always get back what we put out. It's time to step it up a notch. I also hope that I am in a position to meet my soul mate. That is what I want. I know the universe works in mysterious ways. I will always get what I need and not always what I want.

At risk of sounding desperate, I'm lonely. I want that person who completes me. I can tell him anything and he will still love me and hold me. That person who compliments me and I him. I just want to share my life with someone who deserves it. Why is that so difficult to find?

So to summarize, I am trying to work on being a better person. Not that I am horrible but there is always room for improvement. A word of warning you are going to see a bit of a softer side from me for awhile. I have not been snatched by pod people or anything, it's just another side of me.

My only other with wish for the new year is that Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears DO NOT get back together. I can handle not having him for myself but I can't see him back with that trash. LMAO!!

I love you guys. Have a Happy Holiday and very Joyous New Year!!

Kaileen