demonic420

was watching a movie at work tonight. wasnt my choice but it just got to me. i hate relationship movies, especially the one that had babies. this one three different couples had babies. the reason why? in my last relationship we were trying to have a baby. we had alot of miscarrages and one still born at 3 months. yeah it takes a toll on you in the deepest parts. growing up i was always told to babysit so i just thought what the hell ok. little did i know i watch most of my little cousins when they were babies. changed then, feed them, bath them, even sent them off to school and waited for them to come home. watching that movie just hit a nerve i was like...fuck this. haha funny i know but ive always wanted to be a father. since i was 22 years old. im 28 now and my ex left me for one of her old ex. my brother has 2 sons, one is 5 the other is 1 almost 2. all my friends have atleast 1 child most 2. when i talk about the father i want to be to some people all i get back is "oh youll make a good dad one day" i hear that alot and it gets to me. when they have a child and the father isnt there. but im gonna call it a night. hope i dont have dreams about having a family, seems thats all im surrounded by lately....Families. ill feel better in the morning. hopefully.

to the ladies on SG. stay beautiful