What up dawg? What you been up to?
Oh yeah? Well that's cool. Check it out.
You and me, we been down for a while, right?
We've been here and there, we've been pretty tight.
Well something happened last night that you might get upset about...
...but here me out!
I didn't mean nothing by it...I'mma make this quick.
I gave your momma this dick.
I don't know how it happened
I just know that my nuts and her itch was slappin'
I was over there mowin' the grass
and I could feel her eyes all up on my ass and then...
I went inside to make a phone call
and there she was with her titties hangin out her bra
One thing just lead to another...next thing you know...
I'm butt fuckin' your mother.
Please don't hate me, but I've been fuckin' your mom loose lately.
Please don't hate me.
Don't hang up - I still got more!
Your mother gives head like a heroin whore.
I wasn't thinkin 'bout you as my bud when she spreaded by butt cheeks and went for the milkdud.
We broke out with your grandpa's gin and got drunk
I fucked her with a bowling pin
She's freaky! Her nipples look like peanuts
Your momma's one of my favorite sluts.
She likes lickin' from the back of my balls to the tip of my dick with one big lick!
She calls me her big teddy bear.
Rowr! I chase her around in my underwear!
I'll admit, I like spankin' her butt
I used your sock though to catch my nut.
Don't worry! I put it back. I knew better.
That's probably why your toes been stickin' together!
Please don't hate me, but I've been fucking your mom loose lately.
Please don't hate me.
Your mom's ass looks like oatmeal yo.
It's bumpy and grainy, I like the feel though.
And I ain't tryin' to dis her either...
I just wish you would trim her beaver some.
Every hair is like a foot long.
Bitch looks like a werewolf wearing a thong, sometimes!
It's alright with me though,
I don't mind as long as I can locate the pee hole!
And you're dad's so dumb he's knowin' nothing while I'm stuffin her muffin not to mention the pickle buffin'
I hope you and me are still cool though
I'm spendin the night so she can drive me to school tommorow.
And we plan on fuckin' again...
...alright, I'll talk to you later, peace Eminem!
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Otherwise, I had to stop by and say hi.