Monday Oct 21, 2002

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So things are getting a little better with homelife. My spasms are calming down. I'm getting more used to getting around the house. One thing, though, my room is pretty messy. I have so many things to organize, and although it would have been easy when I was able to walk, it's hard now because I cannot carry things as easily, and moving around is tough. Being a cripple sucks.

So I have all these goals I wanna accomplish - Write a script, write a story, start a gaming club...but shit is so hard these days. Well, not like shit wasn't hard before. I have so many ideas but I cannot finish them. I really need my aderol again.

Why oh why must I be so conflicted all the time? Part of me wants someone special in my life...part of me doesn't. Part of me thinks I wont be able to in my condition now. Who knows. Weird shit happens all the time, and I think i can claim that I'm one of the more vulnerable subjects for it.

Today's Quote:
"Spark a hearty fire, Paul, and let me tell you a tale of mine penis"
-Me
sabine:
i often get that feeling that i want someone in my life. well, not exactly. that i want someone to love who is in love with me too. i have someone now, i've been seeing for a while, but we're not "together" meaning i could see other people and he could too. yet, we mainly haven't. still, there's no love. affection and caring, but no love. and that's what i'm really longing for. so i'll join you in a *sigh*...but i think we will find our "one" eventually. i just get impatient seeing people who are already there.
i know what you mean about wanting to accomplish so much. i always have things i want to get done, but then i usually don't even start.
i did actually get started on taking my pictures today. i have a long ways to go before an actual set though.
i'll see ya on aim smile

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