delores

so i was just at the drug store and decided to treat myself to a fashion magazine. harper's bazaare is usually really good. lots of pictures, lots of items cramed into the pages... so i'm at home going through it, circling things to cut out later (dont ask) when towards the back, as i'm about to circle a lovely gray chiffon dress, i notice who is wearing it: Frances Bean Cobain. i've seen pictures of her every once in a while over the years and in courtney's collection of diaries... but oh my fucking god! she's gorgeous! she's 15 now, unbelievable... she looks so much like courtney its scary... you cant quite tell whoes eyes she has because kurt and courtney's were so similar.... big and blue. her eyes are more blue green, so i'd have to say they're more courtney in that way... i squeeled when i realized it was her. the spread was her as different characters from musicals, Evita, Rizo from Grease and Belle in Beauty and The Beast.... holy shit. and a hole interview w/ her. i dont think i've read much that was actual dialog out of her mouth except a little from a really great Blender acticle w/ courtney when her solo album came out. but that was like, 2 or 3 years ago at this point. she has courtney's face shape and nose for sure. her old nose that is. one of my favorite pictures in the whole world is her and courtney playing the hello kitty guitars together. its taped to my guitar. puberty is doing the child good. i cant believe she's becoming a woman... its like a child i've known myself. any major hole or nirvana fan i think feels that way. she's going to be one amazingly gifted person...
sorry for the gush. its just that courtney love has been my idol since i was in 6th grade, she's been such a major influence on who i've grown up to be... i dont know if i'd be such a rampant feminist if it wasn't for her...i mean i got it from my mother for sure, but i dont know if it would have sunk in so well if i didnt have courtney...
i dont think anyone can deny the fascination people have over Frances Bean. .. the spawn of two such amazing and trailblazing artists, especially since one died far too young and at the height of his brilliance, is going to have a certain mystique about her...


read the article here'
frances bean frances bean the prettiest girl ever seen...


on another note...check out meg!



and since i was gushing i thought i'd include that sleeping pill induced love letter to amanda palmer of the dresden dolls i never finished:
Dearest Amanda,
Now that I've started this I dont know where to begin. Well, I am watching your live at the Roadhouse dvd and the most dominant feeling i have is laziness. viewing your passion when performing only magnifies the power of your songs.
The immediacy with which i related to your songs and then became obsessed with them was shocking, even to myself. Considering who introduced me to your music, it's a wonder that i was able to become as interested as i am. My ex-boyfriend put Coin Operated Boy on a mix cd he made to try to get me back, with the only introduction being ''i want to be your coin operated boy'', stating i'd understand once i'd heard the song. i know what he was getting at but of course he missed the point of the song entirely. A side note about that mix cd is that most of the songs he put on there were from bands/singers i'd introduced him to (jeff buckley to name one), lame right?
quite a while later i downloaded several songs (i never would have bought the album if i hadnt heard a sampling first. piracy rules damn it), Girl Anachronism, Bad Habit, Half Jack, 30 Wacks, Perfect Fit, right at the time i was going through a rough, but totally seperate breakup from the one mentioned above. it was perfect timing. i got to wallow, i got to be soothed... i love you for that. soon after that i bought the album... nothing could come come close for a very very long time.
many times i feel compelled to write love letters like this to women i admire (usually song writers), but usually i run out of inspiration and put it aside. Courtney Love has been my idol since the 6th grade and i've never completed a letter to her. i've started many, but can never wrap them up.
i put you into a catagory of female singer/songwriters i like to call '' everywomen'', made up of the likes of Courtney Love, Juliana Hatfield, Regina Spektor, Ani Difranco, , Tori Amos, among others. Women who can express through song all those scary, schitzo, possibly female exclusive emotions and situations. the first time i heard Jeep Song, i was floored. i really thought that i was the only person in the whole world who freaked out every time they saw the same model of car that they're ex drove... i do that to this day. focuses and 80s broncos mainly... its comforting to know one is not alone on ones craziness.
i was amazed though not surprised to discover that you were a fan of Regina Spektor. i got heavy into her at about the same time as The Dresden Dolls and never knew of any connection until seeing the Paradise live dvd, and then of course reading the liners of the roadhouse dvd, informing me that you're actually friends (jealous of both of you actually for eachothers friendship). and then to discover that the band are friends of Margaret Cho only serves to prove the fact that cool people congrigate in close circles.
i think the Shores Of California video is genius by the way. i recognized it as a response to David Lee Roth's California Girls immedietly. i love it! the song is genius as well by the way.
i do not exagerate when i say i believe you will go down as one of the best song writers of our time.
i dont think there is a single thing i dont like about the Dresden Dolls. The style, the art of it, the inclusion of performance art, it's all genius. (i know i've used the word genius many times already, but it feels like the only fitting word)
ok, wait. one thing... you guys blow my mind so much that it makes me feel totally without vision, without passion. i want to be like you but i know i'm not, so it makes me feel useless. but that's not your fault.
to hear songs about such personal and misuderstood things (like self mutilation for example) is such a beautiful thing these days. even your breakup songs (the most cliche of song subjects) have a refreshing twist to them.
my favorite thing in the world is to drive fast, windows rolled down, blasting your songs, and singing at the top of my lungs until my throat is horse. the songs make me feel an unparallelled sense of freedom.
what inspires you? what inspired the concept for the Dresden Dolls? i'm especially curious about the inspiration for the burlesque/vaudville qualities for your act... its so incredible and unique and fascinating that i just want to know how you came up with it.

so thats where i ran out of steam or simply passed out on sleeping pills.... to close my letter...

enough's enough. i've wasted enough of your time... i would like to thank you for the incredible songs and images you've branded into my mind and heart forever.
adoringly yours,
-D


etc...