It's crazy to think that when you're feeling upset, anxious or sad you can physically feel your chest tightening. Or when you feel excited your palms may begin to moisten and your heart palpitates. And when you see something, or someone, you love and/or care about your pupils dilates. How can our feels be only all chemical reactions within us but there isn't a magic pill that can make you forget about those feels in the first place. Of course there's the obvious solutions of doing drugs but it's only temporary. When you fall out of that high, that person or thing is still on your mind and the pressure in your chest all comes rushing back. Is it a blessing or a curse to feel this way about a single person? Right now, it feels scary but it's also pretty exciting. I've never felt this way about a single person and I'm starting to think it's bordering obsessiveness. I guess this is what it really feels to actually like someone.
Anyways, sorry for the melodrama. I have someone on my mind that won't seem to go away. Maybe finally seeing everyone around me starting families or starting a new life together with someone is starting to make me think of my future. I still enjoy being single. (Will probably be for a looooong time) I have too many hang ups to get over before I'm ready to let anyone break down my walls. Even Deadpool wouldn't be able to crossover this 4th wall.
Ugh
As I'm typing this, I'm releasing exacerbatingly long sighs over and over again, wishing with every breath that cupid will leave me alone.
Welps, this is getting long and depressing.
Later days :/
