deceptiviewfilm

I warn you...this is going to be very emo....I'm not even going to spoil it...

Its amazing how a week can change your life....one minute your happy as a clam or relatively happy...Next your crying at work wiping your eyes so that your coworkers dont see you. But they dont understand the sadness in your heart. The bitterness that grows every night while you think bout what could've been. That you clinch the steering a tad tighter when you think bout what went wrong. That Nice guys NEVER FUCKING FINISH FIRST(don't believe the hype) and part of you wants to just rip into them and tell them really how you feel but no, you bite your tongue because you thought you were being a better friend.

Oh No....They dont know about the headaches you get because of the misery you have or continually wonder why are you the way you are. Is this some sort of re-incarnation punishment? Am I destined for misery? Was I such a horrible person in another life that I'm being punished this time around????

Few times in my life have I felt this way...so miserable and utterly helpless...ready to do almost anything to make the pain go away to stop the suffering you feel....to feel a sense of happiness....Last time I felt it....it took me 5 months to get over it....This time...i dont know....

Oh I've cleaned my friend's list(if you havent noticed yet...too bad) if your not on it...there's a probably a reason....