There was a log on the fire. A wooden log.
That's the first thing that made me think something was wrong.

The second thing was that the fire was in the living room.
On a table.
A wooden table.
We were already at two things that made me think something was wrong.
But thinking is not knowing.
The third thing that made me think...
Read More
I just saw a BMW commercial saying 'experience the ideas of tomorrow today'. Sounds exciting right?
Really fucking exciting. Tomorrow is the future for fucks sake, that's almost time travel! In a car. How did no one ever think of such a thing before?
I was about to drop everything and sprint to the BMW shop as fast as possible (apparently they don't...
Read More
milbond:
This was an entertaining read!
When the carousel stops.
It's gears rusty.
It's horses dusty.
It's memories musty like an old man's cigarette and whisky phlegm coughed into an jar of mustard hoping one of his grandchildren will beg for yet 'another fucking hotdog grampa'.
'In my day we didn't say fucking to elders you little shits.'
'In your day you were too busy hoping...
Read More
0

As a professional awesome guy, one of the things I spend much of my energy on is trying to make sure I never find myself without some form of entertainment in front of me coming out of TVs, speakers, musical instruments, and even real life faces sometimes, in a desperate hope that I'll never be forced to face pure silence and have to listen...
Read More
0

I got a haircut yesterday - and yes, thank you, I wanted to look like a bearded lesbian, I am glad you noticed, approve and more than that applaud me for it. You are all very sweet and generous people, and I will most certainly take your compliments, love, and praise and pack them into the small hole I keep below my left pancreas, which is...
Read More

0

I know what your thinking, 'I own an awesome cannon, but how do I know if the bottom may need a scrub?'

Fear not, my fellow canon owners, by which I assume I mean all of you - here are some very simple signs that have the ability to signify to you that it is time to get down and scrub that beautiful cannon bottom of...
Read More

1
I have made a decision, right now, to write a clean blog. A totally, completely, unquestionably clean blog. A blog completely absent of filth, controversial themes, naughty words, or even my usual favorite, downright psychotic imagery.
‘Why the fuck do you want to do that?’ I hear you ask.
And I must say, please don’t think swear words at me, I mean normally you...
Read More
1

It's time for me to start posting some shit again, or re-start, or continue after a long break, like a starting again from a previous ending, which wasn't really an ending, meaning it's not really a start, but you know, hello everyone!

Point is, as the above line above can attest to, I need to just start damn blogging and tweeting and...
Read More

1
So my new book is out, its about all the most embarrassing things that have ever happened to me, and mental illness, lots of mental illness, and overcoming that stuff!!! Or making it worse, you know, it's a slippery slope...


http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00AZK8VII/ref=cm_cr_mts_prod_img
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
hanke:
congrats boy! one of my dreams is to write a book!
davidtieck:
Thank you!!! And good luck Hanke, just write what inspires you and you'll do great smile
0
A gift from me a new hair metal ballad

The other day I saw Aerosmith and Cheap Trick, and it was awesome. Yet a few things hit me up front.

- There are still actually people who will verbally complain at you if you stand up at a rock concert
- These people epitomize everything I hate in the world
- Except for cliff diving not being an...
Read More