i have a tendency to become irrational, abusive, and loud. i believe i have a napoleon complex and people do things to push it out. some have said scitzophrenia, obsessive compulsive, and personality disorder could be my problem. i think what i see is realistic and others choose to ignore it. i get upset so i clean. what is wrong with that? i could possibly tone down the cleaning but nobody else would even consider cleaning in the places i do. and what about those weird kids with the "i'm an anarchist," but call themselves "communist" to suit the masses. or "i am anti-social" because they want to be that stereotypical writer/artist/poet crap, and yet find it easy to go outside and not engage in anti-social behavior other than hide in there room.
I am anti-social and it sucks, i get paranoid to go outside beyond my neighbourhood and i yell at people for spilling coriander on the floor to the point where i almost hit them and then i clean and sometimes hide under a blanket or lay on the kitchen floor and moan. i thank them for there visit but they have no idea what it feels like to be anti-social. it's not fashion it's a bloody problem. go and be a writer, but write don't act. i may be childish but i am not pretending not to be.
I am anti-social and it sucks, i get paranoid to go outside beyond my neighbourhood and i yell at people for spilling coriander on the floor to the point where i almost hit them and then i clean and sometimes hide under a blanket or lay on the kitchen floor and moan. i thank them for there visit but they have no idea what it feels like to be anti-social. it's not fashion it's a bloody problem. go and be a writer, but write don't act. i may be childish but i am not pretending not to be.
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take care
Screw what people say about being schizo, having OCD, or any other personality disorder. Tell the dimestore psychologists to take it down the street to the coffee house, and help someone who actually needs it from the doctor with the PhD from community college...and you will see what most people dont. Genius is often misunderstood (or you really are delusional, i dunno)
As for the cleaning, I am messy as hell...on purpose...cuz I know that I will need the cleaning time to get my frustrations out. Its very cathartic, and it sure as hell beats what I used to do - watching reality TV. Now THATS self destructive (filming pigeon porn wasnt such a good idea either, in hindsight)
Im curious as to why you get paranoid to leave the house....and bars and clubs ARENT overrated...most PEOPLE are. I just go for loud music, and to hopefully have a semi-meaningful experience with someone that I will probably forget about the next day...I love to go out, and seem to get along with a lot of people...yet I cant stand most people because they are rude, ignorant, self-absorbed, or republicans....but sometimes, you gotta go out and have fun and hate the world a little more so you appreciate the cleaning time you get at home
Best of luck with the childishness and fetal position kitchen moaning