I shouldn't even write this. But wtf, i am in belgium for a conference and have to socialize and drink triple' beers for days and on. And I outta write something sooner or later to get it off my chest...
Saturday, I introduced @leanan and my crush and once the prior held my hand for a second just to have a moment of fun and dancing I saw the latter staring at her like I have NEVER in my life seen from any of my girlfriends (and that's considering one of them tried to stare down a Tori Amos door poster)
I've really not seen a stare like this before. It was just a second or two, but it was pure.. idk...? not evil, but total disapproval, anger, frustration all mixed into a single stare. I'm glad (you) didn't have to see what hit (you).
So right. Yeah. she doesn't wanna be with me at all. tried to hook me up with some boring girl on NYE. but once a (utterly) beautiful person like some SG here just dares touch my hand she throws a glance that would shame the fucking Death Star itself into a sad little puppy.
I had gone into therapy to have support with, well, dealing that she doesn't want me, and, now, lol? *This* happens????
But FUCK... I am glad to now know, that, no matter what reasons of hold her back, make it look sensible to her to NOT be with me, she goes into killing mode if anyone else in her league just lays hand on me.
If you ever read this: Now matter how drunk I was when I wrote this...:
I fucking love you. I can't even go down with other girls anymore. There's only you and your smile
End. Of. Story.
