I've not even beginning to cope with what happened to my heart. I took some steps to find out how I'll get by and somehow learn to live while missing my crush every day, as always. Hopefully that will work out.
A story quite amusing is this: so, you know I'm shy as hell? enough to not even manage to get the woman I like most in my life? Awkward and embarrassed on almost any photo taken of me? Afraid, never resting safely?
Last weekend I've been to my most favourite festival. Danced for three days. At long last finally spend most of the time not missing _that girl_. We had a 196.000W (?????!) sound system and the sound was everything to torture a normal person but also to give freedom to a tortured soul. I still missed having her around as a friend to enjoy the party with. Which is a much easier mode of living...
I ran into a really cute girl whom I could never have resisted, we flirted and kissed around quite a lot.
Someone made a video of our closing party outside after everything had shut down for hours. It was 7am. I was not just a little drunk.
And the thing is... there's a video from that after-party. where mr. blonde guy tried really hard (and understandably) to get between us, trying to dance with the thing she threw me. I got it back, dance with some cheers, hand it to another girl and guy throws it back to cutie... ok... but then?
Then there's me simply walking through that guy like he doesn't even exist, while I go pick up my next kiss. (you could skip to 2:31, but actually it was a perfect 7am party so just enjoy)
So after 3 days of dancing and a few beers shy is not even in the vocabulary anymore?
Oh, and I initially chatted her up simply smiling and asking "can I take a pic of your indescribably hot tummy?"
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK CAN I PLEASE ALWAYS BE LIKE THAT?