darkangelazrael

Please tell me this is not love.
I certainly hope that what I feel is not the real thing.
There is no way for me to explain to you what we might have been.
To each other, for each other.
I got your letter finally.
The one you left on the windshield of my car.
It was down under the hood between the firewall and the power steering reservoir.
It said that you love me.
Do you?
Could you have told me?
Could you not say what you had written down, now faded and wrinkled.
I wish I had never found it, but I did.
I only wish It could be like those nights.
The ones at the park where I would do nothing but hold you.
Like the night you told me you had never felt so safe with another human being.
I want to make you feel safe forever. And at the same time I want you to feel afraid.
You were never afraid that I could disappear. Not to be a part of your life wounds me, with every moment we are apart.
I am listless and alone.
No one remembered my birthday this year.
It's probably all my fault anyhow, for pulling away.
But God I just wish someone could remember me.
If even for a day.