I am going into hibernation.
SPOILERS! (Click to view)I was doing my last minute Christmas shopping and i found a book called "Everything i've ever done that worked", and it's "a resource book...for when life bowls you over and you forget what works. Like a fantastic spiritual and emotional first aid" I sort of thought it might be horse shit, but i bought it anyway, and you know, it's not. It's gotton me thinking about a great many things. One of the chapters in the book is called "When the sea is rough, mend your sails", and it's about those times in your life when nothing is working. And it's described as "a period of winter, a time to hibernate, to turn your energy inward and do your growing underground". Winter doesn't last forever, and periods of winter come and go, but winter is always followed by spring, and times of inactivity are followed by good times. And i feel like i'm in my winter. Nothing is really going my way. So it's time to put my head down and hibernate. To learn and grow and prepare for what lies ahead.
So far the hibernation is going well. I'm not going to curl into a ball and hide away. But i am going to cut back on my going out. My days as the Malibu princess of Moldova are over for the time being. I just want to go out and work on my friendships with people. I'm not even really fussed about meeting new people, it'll happen if it happens. But i want to work on me. Get to know me again. Get to know my friends better, and STUDY. Christ i've been putting that one off, and i have to cop on. And i will.
So far this weekend i've had a "non-date" with a boy. Hung out with Raistlyn, and tomorrow i'm off to the cinema with Mikey. I like this hibernation thing. It's quality time for me and the people i care about.
No time at the moment for stupid games, and the stupid people that play them. I can see clearly now, in my state of hibernation that some things are meant not to be interfered with. My fault, and i accept that. But, i'm not going to play anymore. Not bitter, not petty, not pissed off. Slightly let down, but not willing to play.
Straightforward is the way forward.
And Raistlyn, you're boss keeps texting me. Asking me to go clubbing with him.
Hibernation people, it's the way forward.
SPOILERS! (Click to view)And i just want to point out how much i adore
Almostfamous, he sent me a christmas present, of a few of his favourite things so i can get to know him better. I love that guy. He's amazing, and cute to boot. Ladies, go find him. He's sweet, funny, and a great friend. And we're going on holidays together. I can't bloody wait to hang out with him.