Well, my time with my wife is about to come to a close. She has to go back to the states tomorrow, and then I’ll be all by myself again for god only knows how long.
my time with my kids was nixed, traveling to the states is not an option for servicemen at this time unless permanently moving or in the event of a family emergency. So yeah... FUCK COVID, and FUCK 2020 altogether.
I will say that I am glad my wife was able to come here for as long as she did, and that my ex-wife was kind enough to let my son visit with my family back home in my absence... but it’s not the same, when you’re away from your family for long periods of time it affects and changes you, and not necessarily for the better.
part of me is used to being away. I’ve been in the Army for over 14 years, and have lived/traveled all over the world. But it still hurts when I’m gone, and the hurt it causes my kids only makes me feel worse. I signed up for this, they didn’t... I know it’s all a means to an end, and they understand. But when I see they’re faces and hear they’re voices after telling them I won’t see them til maybe Christmas it’s a visceral gut punch and a kick to the teeth.
Im just sad, and wanted to vent. Not trying to make light of other people’s issues or struggles. I know others out there have it just as bad and even worse. I just felt the need to get this off my chest I guess. In conclusion, I’m so over all this bullshit, bitch session over, rant/remarks complete!!!