cutnhalf

fuckers!

What do you want me to say? That I regret my decision and I want you back? I'm sorry JV, but I don't. I realize my earlier behaviours were not very becoming, and yet somewhat vile, but, then I realized there was other people in the world beside my signficant other.

Alot of people matter to me, not just myself. I have the greatest friends in the world.

This was a decision I had to make, and I haven't regreted it once. I still do care about you JV, but I... There is no way I would jump into another relationship again. I don't want or like the drama bullshit.

I didn't delete you from my life, but if all I am going to see is what you have been putting on here then I don't want to talk to you. Rae, Rinny and Tinny are not very happy with you either. There is no reason to say all off this shit, because, and not to sound like the biggest bitch on the planet, but if you were going to do something, you wouldn't announce it to the fucking world.
I don't understand why you are doing this. I'm sorry I hurt you, but now, you are hurting me.

Come to work and get your shit from me. And I want everything back of mine. Shoes, clothes, photo album... everything... Come on friday.


[Edited on Feb 15, 2005 8:12AM]

chin up swetie..i hope things get better

What haven't I told anyone? That you backed me into corners and tried to control me? Had to know who I was with, what I was doing if you weren't there, which wasn't very often. I included you in all the plans with the friends, I introduced you to people. That's alot different than sitting in your house feeling bad for yourself. I'm sorry that I hurt you, but I never ment to. And it's bullshit that you think I am lieing to you, I'm not. I never have. I have nothing to lie about. I never talk to Jenn, or my mom about you. But yes, it has been better around here. I can sit at home for a night and be comfortable. It's a good change.

I'm sorry that I did hurt you, but it wasn't a fucking one way street on this. Everyday I come on here and read your entries, because I fucking care, but yet it's this shit. John, what the fuck are you doing? Over a fucking girl? There is no fucking reason you should've lost your job, you shouldn't be drinking all the time. How the fuck did I drive you to that?

I don't even know what to say to you.

I had a MRI once, a long time ago. scary as all hell, I hope you are ok.

I am unaware of how to cancel it.

What did I lie to you about? About telling Jenn, I never did. I never told my parents either. Do you think I wanted to listen to the "I told you so?" Not at all. JV, I don't know what else you want me to say.

There is no reason to cut yourself.

I haven't talked to Gilley in months, so he wouldn't know. And I told Gay Brian what I told you... I never told my sister, just like my family. I have no reason to lie to you. I never did. And I am not cold towards you... I don't hate you, nor do I think badly of you...