curveball8

A great sense of guilt washes over me after a day of not doing a thing.

Wanted to go out, but didn't feel like chasing « friends » to pretend like I have something to do.

So I worked and watched football. What else can you do when everything else fails? Work, and work some more.

I used to enjoy these days inside. Not getting...
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Been listening to a lot of stand-up lately (namely Patton Oswalt) and I was wondering -- when do we dare to let the idea of depression sink into our mind?

We feel down, some days are rough. Everybody gets that.

But what is the tipping point between a bad day and depression?

The more I'm listening to jokes about it, the more I relate. And...
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Montreal is under it's first snow of the year this morning.

Altough I hate shoveling my car and wearing winter clothes, this one is always a little bit special.

Maybe because my daughter is going bat shit crazy about it. It helps. But still, snow brings the good out of people the first time it shows up.

You should try it sometimes.

Did you ever get that feeling where you don't seem to belong anywhere ?

Alone at home, a stranger at work, a ghost to what's left of your family.

Always familiar, but never whole.

I am a ghost. People know my name, but they don't know my shame.

My mind, my life.

And a walk on a daily basis, trying to find a smile or...
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«A great numb feeling washes over me as I let go of the past and look forward to the future... »
- B.E. Ellis, The Rules of Attraction

I've been sick the last few days and, in between fever spikes, I was thinking.

How bad does it suck to be all alone in this day to day routine. Sure, flirting is fun. Dating and occasional...
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I'm in this weird space in my head where I want to meet new people.

New friends, new dates, just new people.

But the more I seek, the more I'm getting the sense that past 30, there isen't just no room for new people in our heart.

Everybody comes with his own history, expectations. Everybody is out there and time is a commodity now.

You...
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I'm not a huge fan of Halloween.

But I have a little girl, so we have to make it a big deal for her. She's so happy, how can I refuse that to her.

But the aftermath, when she's goes back to her mom, makes me incredibly sad.

So I spent the week-end bouncing from plans to plans, boring date on saturday and this afternoon....
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I've been writing on a smallish chromebook for more than a year now and I cave -- New 17 inches laptop for the house.

Night and day.

Wow, full display, as if what I am writing makes sense now.

It's a whole new world - but the same old me.

À suivre.

I enjoy most parts of my line of work.

Writings, researchs, spending time on the internet. This a good way for me to spend a day.

Except when I have to conduct an interview.

It is part of my job and it sheds a light on my hard time connecting with people.

Especially with strangers.

So Radiohead was wrong : Meeting people is not easy.