curss

alls quiet on the western front...bought some "grown-up" sheets for my bed today...grown-up as in i finally have a set that match and are really a legitimate set...i thought that shit would be cheaper for a big sheet and a couple pillow cases...fuck!!!...and i bought them at WAL-MART in the ghetto mall...still cost me...whatever...it was long overdue...and then i watched PLANET TERROR...which was fuckin awesome!!!...way...
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What's up with girls that fall madly in love with a different guy every week???...yeah-I know I am EMOTIONAL REX (king of re-hashing sad memories) ...but that's just fucking flaky as hell...I AM guilty of pining over gals that I've been lucky enough to have shared some honest feelings of love for...but at least I don't pick some random person and decide that my world...
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I recently ran into an ex girlfriend that I haven't seen in about 8 or 9 years or so...feels like just yesterday she left...we dated for 2 years and things were primarily great between us...I even quit drinking for her...not that she asked me too...I decided on my own it was better for our relationship...but she had some serious health issues and therefore we had...
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as i predicted...something weird and really fucked up happened...but i don't really feel like talking or writing about it right now...i'm drunk and a little depressed about todays events...maybe later...maybe never...who gives a fuck...........................................

The Clothing Show is today...which I have to be at shortly...I'm sure something weird or funny or stupid will happen...it usually does...details at 11:00.

So I'm drying off after my shower this morning and kinda ram my elbow into the towel-rack which hurt pretty good thanks...but what's really cool is that I managed to dislodge the shelf that was screwed into the living room wall...which is on the other side of my bathroom...all my shit went flying and my cats had little kitty cardiacs...buuuuuuuuuuut on a brighter note...I found...
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It stormed tonite when I got home from work...but it didn't seem to last very long...
I wanted it to thunder louder
-lightening brighter
-and rain harder
...let it bring it all down...and wash it away

I haven't been in very good spirits lately...and I know that by reading most of these...it doesn't come across as if I'm ever in a good mood...but it does...
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So one of the lovely ladies from this site wandered into my store on holiday Monday...I won't say who exactly it was...but she sure is a looker...and tomorrow I'll probably see the other Suicide Girl who comes into the store on a fairly regular basis...she's a doll too...I don't ever bother to acknowledge that I recognize them from here...seems kinda like a dumb way to...
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So I was asked to be in a HEDLEY video today...who the hell is HEDLEY?...I know they're canadian...and some friends laughed when I told them about this...so I'm thinkin they're no good...I woulda played the guy who steals the girlfriend away...from the whole band?...who knows...anyways I couldn't go cuz of stupid regular work...woulda been easy money...easy HEDLEY money!!!...that's worth more with the exchange I think...they...
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Well apparently I lost a friend on this site today...or last nite...not sure which...and the best part is I don't even know why...I tried really hard to be a good friend to her...but she made it very difficult for me to get close to her...so I guess she didn't want to know me...so no explanations...no good-byes...just one less person on my friends list... ... ......
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So here's what i'm thinkin...about relationships...and dating...and fucking...

Relationships: I've come to the sad realization that I'm not very good at them...I haven't figured out why yet...well maybe I have some theories-I just don't wanna get into it tonite...but yeah, I'm not good at them...

Dating: I don't really see the point in it anymore...it's alot of work and if I can't do the relationship...
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I can feel a major journal entry brewing...don't know yet if it's good or bad...time will tell.

oh yeah and I saw my x-mas ex today...the one i call crazy-face...it's weird...but for the life of me...i can't recall why i dated her...there was absolutely nothing there...in fact i kinda wished i was somewhere else...i've never been so happy to see my streetcar arrive...usually i can...
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