You could say an angel came to me in my sleep last night. Not in any sort of dramatic way. But I woke up and couldn't get myself back to sleep. Because I had preoccupations. I was hung up on so many things. These things bogged me down and now all I want is to be free of them. So I have no choice but to keep their chains. But others I have self imposed. Let this be my list. Let this be the summer that I actually do something. May I do away with temptation that will show its head once I go back to school.
I am dissappointed in myself for my academics the past four years. Not that I haven't learned. And yes I do think the collegiate system in America is bullshit, but I should've done something earlier instead of the careless flunking of classes and wasting of my money.
The next issue: money. Excuse the pun, but I have passed the buck of my problems on money for too long. Only when I don't have it to pay for something like rent, do I scorn it. But I have no problem going to the bar almost every night. We know the worth of water when the well dries up.
My health is also I have thrown to the wind. I don't go to the doctor unless I am 100% certain I need medicine. And while I know I have a lot of issues to weed through before I get to the laziness that keeps me exercising, I should go for check ups. My hang, however, is I see the doctor as someone who is trying to make a living too. So if he's the expert on what I have, who's to say I really have that problem? I need to stop waiting til I am in the dire straits.
My weed and alcohol problems are something that I have self imposed, and since that self destructive side of me is the majority of my person, I don't really see it as a problem. I mean come on, I am 22. A golden year in my llife. BUT I have to stop wasting time and money. Weed and alcohol are (especially the first) are luxuries for people who are 'free.' Free from adversity and money problems. People with time and space available to them. And I am not saying that I am not one of those people. But I am bogged in a system more often than not, so I need to PRIORITIZE.
Well I am off kids. See you soon. I've got a lot of living to do.
I am dissappointed in myself for my academics the past four years. Not that I haven't learned. And yes I do think the collegiate system in America is bullshit, but I should've done something earlier instead of the careless flunking of classes and wasting of my money.
The next issue: money. Excuse the pun, but I have passed the buck of my problems on money for too long. Only when I don't have it to pay for something like rent, do I scorn it. But I have no problem going to the bar almost every night. We know the worth of water when the well dries up.
My health is also I have thrown to the wind. I don't go to the doctor unless I am 100% certain I need medicine. And while I know I have a lot of issues to weed through before I get to the laziness that keeps me exercising, I should go for check ups. My hang, however, is I see the doctor as someone who is trying to make a living too. So if he's the expert on what I have, who's to say I really have that problem? I need to stop waiting til I am in the dire straits.
My weed and alcohol problems are something that I have self imposed, and since that self destructive side of me is the majority of my person, I don't really see it as a problem. I mean come on, I am 22. A golden year in my llife. BUT I have to stop wasting time and money. Weed and alcohol are (especially the first) are luxuries for people who are 'free.' Free from adversity and money problems. People with time and space available to them. And I am not saying that I am not one of those people. But I am bogged in a system more often than not, so I need to PRIORITIZE.
Well I am off kids. See you soon. I've got a lot of living to do.
ganja you just pull from the ground, dry and cure it and you're ready to go.
but I know where you're coming from. Realize it at 22 before you realize it at 32 (like me).