I am going to tell you two things that you will find hard to believe...but they are true...It involves a hillbilly and my shirt...I had the most random dream last night...I had two chocolate labs...Riley and an unnamed female...Then I dreamed I went to the Northshore of Massachusetts...When I read the name of the town off the sign at the beach on Cape Ann...I knew something wasn't right...It said Turkey...Turkey Massachusetts...I did have a turkey sandwich last night...05:30 hours my phone started singing Weezer to me..."Say it Ain't So"...I thought it too...To early...I Was having these whacked out dreams...I searched for my Diet Pepsi...Turned on the CPU...Played online...Married with Children was the tele...It was a great episode where Al discovers these retro shoes that he hid inside the wall of the shoe store because he didnt'[t want to do inventory on in the 70's...I was very thankful that someone showed me their phone in the SG chat because holy cow...It was time to go walk Riley the dog...I still cannot figure what that tattoo is of, on her back...So Riley and went on our walk...We saw the smallest baby bunny...I said to Riley the dog, "Baby the bunny doesn't want to play"...On our way home we walked passed the Hillbilly's house...OMFG...I even put my hand in front of my face...There is a lawn mower in his yard with a plastic trash bag attached to it...Holy Super Ghetto Batman...The Red Sox got hosed last night...Just when you thought they were getting healthier...Boston first baseman Kevin Youkilis left last night's game against Cleveland after the second inning with a jammed right thumb...The Red Sox almost made another comeback last night...Chief Wahoo's Catcher Carlos Santana was taken off the field on a stretcher with his left leg in an air cast after blocking home for an out in the seventh inning last night...Everyone was very concerned about his health because it looked bad...My question is if you block homeplate...How come you can't block the other bases...So I made to work on time...Not for the Random road construction on the most random back road on the face of the earth...Going to down this old windey road at 30mph, you know the speed limit...Bam...There 7 dump trucks and police officers working the detail...I had to wait a few minutes while they fingered out how to direct traffic...I made it to work on time...So I got out of my truck...I saw my reflection in the window...I said OMFG, did I rip my shirt...I had a white polo with blue horizontal stripes...It looked funny where the buttons are...I then said, OMG where are the buttons at the top...This funny feeling upon me...I could feel I was becoming flush in the face...I was wearing my shirt inside out...I had put it on...Drove almost 40 minutes before I realized it...I went in to work quickly, swiped my badge, and bolted for the bathroom to turn it inside out...I was then thinking...He that's a great way to keep your white shirt clean until you do get to work...I would take Velma or Daphne...Any day of the week!
Today in 1958, The nuclear submarine USS Nautilus travels beneath the Arctic ice
cap...Happy Birthday Martha Stewart!! She should write a seductive prison book...NOT!! Mike Cameron is back on the disabled list because of the abdominal tear...At least he tried to play through it...He didn't spend four months in the Nurse's office...Jacoby Ellsbury will played today for the PawSox., at which point he will be evaluated yet again...Rib Drama...He will get to meet the Red Sox's newest player Jarrod Saltalamacchia...Saltalamacchia went 0-for-4 with a walk in his debut for the PawSox last night...Today at work I watched on CNN a warehouse worker in Connecticut...who had been called in to resign his job at a beer distributor started shooting people...
Today in 1858, 1st mail boxes installed in Boston and New York City streets...Happy Birthday Mamie Gummer!! I think the biggest problem that the Red Sox faced last night was the fact that John Lackey allowed six runs on nine hits and five walks in 5 1/3 innings and took the loss...That's not quite Pedro Martinez 1999 type pitching...Termites eat wood twice as fast when listening to heavy metal music...Wanna get away...I would if I was a fifty-year-old Cohasset mom named Elizabeth McQuade...Possible goosebump alert...She was arrested May 17 and was order by a judge to undergo an alcohol evaluation to determine if she had a problem...Before she could be tested...She was busted Saturday...Bust you say...I <3 Breast! McQuade and her son, Taylor, 18, pleaded not guilty yesterday in Court to charges they let 23 teens drink at their home Saturday...Ok so here is where we get to the wanna get away part...Fingernails on the chaulkboard aleret...When police arrived they also heard a group of about 30 people chanting take off your shirt and we got your shirt off,...O-M-G...Could you imagine trying to explain that one to the judge...Bill Cosbey used Twitter to explain he is not dead, "Again, I'm rebuttaling rumors about my demise. But, I'm confirming I have an app,"...Someone was in love when they wrote,"more than a woman"...
Rod Beck now there is a name from the past...Seriously...Today would of been his birthday...I totally forgot that he died in 2007, I do remember him pitching for the Red Sox...Amityville's Zip code is 11701...V-Mart stop trying to touch Adrian Beltre's head...If you attempted to count to stars in a galaxy at a rate of one every
second it would take around 3,000 years to count them all...
Today in 1921, Chicago jury brings in not guilty verdict against the Black Sox...Happy Birthday Tom Brady!! Interesting comments your mom, I mean your wife has about bfeeding...She should definately preach...I mean she lasted three whole weeks herself...Mrs.Tom Brady told UKs Harpers Bazaar, Some people here think they dont have to breastfeed, and I think, Are you going to give chemical food to your child when they are so little?" I would like to say this back to her...Dear Mrs.Tom Brady...Not everyone hear in America has a modeling contract and a professional ball player for a husband...They have what is called Jobs, they are often do not pay well, they often are not very interesting, and are very time consuming...Some people have two, JOBS...Furthermore, Mrs. Tom Brady...Not everyone in America has their own chef...Adrian Beltre will be the Comeback Player of the Year...Last night he had two more homeruns...His his 18th and 19th of the season!! Not to mention, Beltre is fourth in the AL with a .336 batting average...Who was that Lady in Red on CNN today...The Cactus Bug Project at the University Of Florida was allocated $325,394 in economic stimulus funds to study the mating decisions of cactus bugs...
Today in 1492, Christopher Columbus sets sail from Palos de la Frontera, Spain...Happy Birthday Jack Straw!! So today I went shopping at Walmarts at got Riley his Beneful Dry dog food...Two weeks ago I had to go to the service desk because it was "rolledback", at least the sign said...They overcharged me...So I had to bring the sign to the girl to prove it...So today all the rollback signs are still on the other beneful products except the one I was buying...I asked to see a manager...The head cashier spoke to me telling me that it's not on roll back because there is no sign there...I told him why...I asked him how do you know where to put the rolllback signs up...in other words check the computer....He said he didn't know...I asked to speak to a real manager...He said all the managers are having a meeting with the corporate people and they couldn't be disturbed...Walmart really??? So I left my phone number...I told him to have one of them called me when they cared about their customers....The economy is so bad that Chinese counterfeiters have turned to more afforadable counterfeit items...These factories are making fake Angel Soft toilet paper...So Sad to hear, ''Mannywood'' is no more at Dodger Stadium LOL...the ''Mannywood'' sign that adorned the shortfence in the left-field corner was absent...Maybe the ''Mannywood'' pulled it's hamstring...or it's grandmother passed away again...The left fielder, who is on the disabled list for the third time this season...When he came to the Dodgers, the club designated a section of seats to him and allowed fans to shell out $99, his number, for two tickets and two T-shirts per game...''Mannywood'', it's a tough economy...The team says, it's gone because the John Hancock Insurance Co. purchased signage in each corner for the final two months of the season...I like the song "She's Gone" by Hall and Oates...According to a report by the U.S. Department of Transportation's Bureauof Transportation Statistics, the baggage check fees collected by U.S. airlines shot up 33% in the first quarter of 2010 to $769 million...Welcome back...Daniel Nava...WELCOME BACK LYRICS...Remember Daniel Nava...He was the second major league player ever to hit a grand slamon the first pitch of hisinitial big league at-bat against Philadelphia on June 12...Exactly two weeks before my birthday...Speaking of June 26th...That's the day Second basemen Dustin Pedroia broke his left foot...He has already been hitting and taking grounders...An ostrichs eye is bigger than its brain...This just in...Kevin Youkilis has been placed on the DL...and Mikey Lowell has been activated...That sucks for this upcoming Yankers series...Fuck...Glad to see you back Mikey Lowell...Just sucks that we lost Youk...Today in 1992, Kevin Bacon marries Kyra Sedgwick...It seemed like dreams belonged to other men, I almost given up, you must of read my mind...Happy Birthday John Landis!! David Huff will start for Chief Wahoo's tribe tonight...Josh Beckett will pitch for the good guys...
Today in 1958, The nuclear submarine USS Nautilus travels beneath the Arctic ice
cap...Happy Birthday Martha Stewart!! She should write a seductive prison book...NOT!! Mike Cameron is back on the disabled list because of the abdominal tear...At least he tried to play through it...He didn't spend four months in the Nurse's office...Jacoby Ellsbury will played today for the PawSox., at which point he will be evaluated yet again...Rib Drama...He will get to meet the Red Sox's newest player Jarrod Saltalamacchia...Saltalamacchia went 0-for-4 with a walk in his debut for the PawSox last night...Today at work I watched on CNN a warehouse worker in Connecticut...who had been called in to resign his job at a beer distributor started shooting people...
Today in 1858, 1st mail boxes installed in Boston and New York City streets...Happy Birthday Mamie Gummer!! I think the biggest problem that the Red Sox faced last night was the fact that John Lackey allowed six runs on nine hits and five walks in 5 1/3 innings and took the loss...That's not quite Pedro Martinez 1999 type pitching...Termites eat wood twice as fast when listening to heavy metal music...Wanna get away...I would if I was a fifty-year-old Cohasset mom named Elizabeth McQuade...Possible goosebump alert...She was arrested May 17 and was order by a judge to undergo an alcohol evaluation to determine if she had a problem...Before she could be tested...She was busted Saturday...Bust you say...I <3 Breast! McQuade and her son, Taylor, 18, pleaded not guilty yesterday in Court to charges they let 23 teens drink at their home Saturday...Ok so here is where we get to the wanna get away part...Fingernails on the chaulkboard aleret...When police arrived they also heard a group of about 30 people chanting take off your shirt and we got your shirt off,...O-M-G...Could you imagine trying to explain that one to the judge...Bill Cosbey used Twitter to explain he is not dead, "Again, I'm rebuttaling rumors about my demise. But, I'm confirming I have an app,"...Someone was in love when they wrote,"more than a woman"...
Rod Beck now there is a name from the past...Seriously...Today would of been his birthday...I totally forgot that he died in 2007, I do remember him pitching for the Red Sox...Amityville's Zip code is 11701...V-Mart stop trying to touch Adrian Beltre's head...If you attempted to count to stars in a galaxy at a rate of one every
second it would take around 3,000 years to count them all...
Today in 1921, Chicago jury brings in not guilty verdict against the Black Sox...Happy Birthday Tom Brady!! Interesting comments your mom, I mean your wife has about bfeeding...She should definately preach...I mean she lasted three whole weeks herself...Mrs.Tom Brady told UKs Harpers Bazaar, Some people here think they dont have to breastfeed, and I think, Are you going to give chemical food to your child when they are so little?" I would like to say this back to her...Dear Mrs.Tom Brady...Not everyone hear in America has a modeling contract and a professional ball player for a husband...They have what is called Jobs, they are often do not pay well, they often are not very interesting, and are very time consuming...Some people have two, JOBS...Furthermore, Mrs. Tom Brady...Not everyone in America has their own chef...Adrian Beltre will be the Comeback Player of the Year...Last night he had two more homeruns...His his 18th and 19th of the season!! Not to mention, Beltre is fourth in the AL with a .336 batting average...Who was that Lady in Red on CNN today...The Cactus Bug Project at the University Of Florida was allocated $325,394 in economic stimulus funds to study the mating decisions of cactus bugs...
Today in 1492, Christopher Columbus sets sail from Palos de la Frontera, Spain...Happy Birthday Jack Straw!! So today I went shopping at Walmarts at got Riley his Beneful Dry dog food...Two weeks ago I had to go to the service desk because it was "rolledback", at least the sign said...They overcharged me...So I had to bring the sign to the girl to prove it...So today all the rollback signs are still on the other beneful products except the one I was buying...I asked to see a manager...The head cashier spoke to me telling me that it's not on roll back because there is no sign there...I told him why...I asked him how do you know where to put the rolllback signs up...in other words check the computer....He said he didn't know...I asked to speak to a real manager...He said all the managers are having a meeting with the corporate people and they couldn't be disturbed...Walmart really??? So I left my phone number...I told him to have one of them called me when they cared about their customers....The economy is so bad that Chinese counterfeiters have turned to more afforadable counterfeit items...These factories are making fake Angel Soft toilet paper...So Sad to hear, ''Mannywood'' is no more at Dodger Stadium LOL...the ''Mannywood'' sign that adorned the shortfence in the left-field corner was absent...Maybe the ''Mannywood'' pulled it's hamstring...or it's grandmother passed away again...The left fielder, who is on the disabled list for the third time this season...When he came to the Dodgers, the club designated a section of seats to him and allowed fans to shell out $99, his number, for two tickets and two T-shirts per game...''Mannywood'', it's a tough economy...The team says, it's gone because the John Hancock Insurance Co. purchased signage in each corner for the final two months of the season...I like the song "She's Gone" by Hall and Oates...According to a report by the U.S. Department of Transportation's Bureauof Transportation Statistics, the baggage check fees collected by U.S. airlines shot up 33% in the first quarter of 2010 to $769 million...Welcome back...Daniel Nava...WELCOME BACK LYRICS...Remember Daniel Nava...He was the second major league player ever to hit a grand slamon the first pitch of hisinitial big league at-bat against Philadelphia on June 12...Exactly two weeks before my birthday...Speaking of June 26th...That's the day Second basemen Dustin Pedroia broke his left foot...He has already been hitting and taking grounders...An ostrichs eye is bigger than its brain...This just in...Kevin Youkilis has been placed on the DL...and Mikey Lowell has been activated...That sucks for this upcoming Yankers series...Fuck...Glad to see you back Mikey Lowell...Just sucks that we lost Youk...Today in 1992, Kevin Bacon marries Kyra Sedgwick...It seemed like dreams belonged to other men, I almost given up, you must of read my mind...Happy Birthday John Landis!! David Huff will start for Chief Wahoo's tribe tonight...Josh Beckett will pitch for the good guys...