cretinsa11

blah.... I've been feeling like shit lately. mostly because I've gained too much weight and I know its going to be a long hard process getting it all off again. I hate my fucking body, It's probably not as bad as you might think looking at my level of disgust. I can't stand that I don't fit into my goddamn clothes anymore. I feel so shitty... ugh.

but that's not the only thing bothering me. I'm in a really bad mood today. I just want school to start so I have something to do with my time. I'm sick of being poor, but if I get a job I may not be able to get my meds anymore, which means I won't be able to sleep, and I'll probably go crazy. damned if I do damned if I don't. I hate not having any money, and I hate that my family is so fucking poor.

I just generally hate everything today... christ I'm so pissed. I want to just track down everybody that hurt my feelings in the last ten years and tear thier throat out.

I don't know what I'm more pissed about... all those things or the fact that they make me angry.