creamygoodness

Part 3453 of the series 'Conversations I probably shouldn't have had with Agentblack'



Witness The Fitness says:
Ahhhhhh, Ben, I do enjoy how you share my same view of the puny humans
Witness The Fitness says:
when I assume global power, it shall be your mind I entomb in the orbital death satelite that will enforce the power of my dark throne
Ben says:
If you disembody me right at the point where we've taken over the world and are in a suitable position to impress ourselves on a variety of nubile young women with nice hair, then I shall rain down death and hellfire atop your head as if God himself tanked up on vindaloo and dropped trou over your noggin
Witness The Fitness says:
Come on, bros before hos! I'd do it after you'd drunk yourself into a such a terminally cirrhotic state that not even the liver transplants of dead seditionists could help you
Ben says:
In that case I want it to be whilst passed out atop a mountain of the skulls of my enemies, their women strewn exhaustedly at my feet
Witness The Fitness says:
In your case it be passed out atop a mountain of empty wine bottoms, the women strewn exhaustedly in your vomit
Ben says:
That'll do
Witness The Fitness says:
top man
Ben says:
And I reserve the right to use my fearsome array of space-borne weaponry to carve out obscene tableaus visible from space in the countryside
Witness The Fitness says:
that's fine
Witness The Fitness says:
on my part, I'll make sure the palace concubines lay in interesting geometric patterns upon the estate grounds for your delight and edification in your spectral electronic tomb
Witness The Fitness says:
Cor, do you know what, i really like the idea of installing the harvested personalities of my dead friends and installing them into weapons of fearsome distructive power
Ben says:
...
Ben says:
There's not really a whole lot you can say to something like that
Witness The Fitness says:
set them up with couple of peta bytes of free memory, give them a military grade interweb connection, and fuck it, they can spend most of their time downloading music and porn and swapping funny youtube clips
Witness The Fitness says:
it'd be like they never really died
Ben says:
I feel slightly insulted yet somewhat intrigued at the same time
Ben says:
Which isn't good for my self-esteem
Witness The Fitness says:
come on, that's not a bad end
Witness The Fitness says:
I could just have you over seeing the flood gates of the sewers of the winter palace
Ben says:
Ok, you make a point there
Ben says:
Still, I know you wouldn't do that, you'd just be wasting one of the few people you don't find an insufferable waste of skin
Witness The Fitness says:
indeed
Witness The Fitness says:
plus you know, tera watt lasers and magnetic catapults
Ben says:
yum yum
Witness The Fitness says:
AND AS MUCH PORN AS A POST HUMAN INTELLIGENCE COULD EVER DESIRE
Ben says:
A VERITABLE SYMPHONY OF SWEATY, UNDULATING FLESH. CONTORTED INTO EVERY CONCEIVABLE COMBINATION AND POSITION
Witness The Fitness says:
Plus you know, granite cores that'd flatten an entire city upon reentry
Ben says:
THIS PORNOGRAPHY DISPLEASES ME. I SHALL TAKE BOSTON AS PENANCE
Witness The Fitness says:
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH BOOM
Witness The Fitness says:
Millions die
Ben says:
I'm liking the sound of this
Ben says:
I REQUIRE MORE PORN. YOU. MANCHESTER. START FUCKING. YES, THAT'S RIGHT, ALL OF YOU.
Witness The Fitness says:
ATTENTION BEIJING
Witness The Fitness says:
YOU AND SINGAPORE TWO'S UP ON JAPAN
Ben says:
Come to think of it, England is perfectly positioned to take Ireland roughly from behind
Ben says:
mmm... Irish redheads
Witness The Fitness says:
that's pretty much what we did for a large part of it's history ben
Ben says:
Then this can be the porno remake
Witness The Fitness says:
"O beggorah, we've no pataters!"
Ben says:
"Don't you worry ma'am, I'VE got a tuber for you"