creamygoodness

EDIT: Holy motherfucking shit! YES LORDI! THE DAY OF ROCKENING IS NOW!



Ben says:
*Preens smugly*
well shit me says:
hehe, bless you
Ben says:
Well I have to find my opportunities to be smug where I can
Ben says:
Which isn't easy when you're shockingly insecure
well shit me says:
you should be smug all the time
well shit me says:
youre awesome
Ben says:
Awww, but I am, of course, horribly outshone by the awesomeness of you
Ben says:

well shit me says:
aaww, never. We are equally awesome, and we should look down on everyone else as they are far inferior
Ben says:
A stirling plan. We need some sort of huge space elevator to lift us up to a suitable elevation so everyone has to look up to us all the time physically as well as metaphorically
well shit me says:
a huge space elevator? hmmm... iand we can have thrones and crowns
well shit me says:
and some kind of animal to show how awesome we are. maybe a pet lion or something
Ben says:
I like the way you think. Some sort of pet lion that rears up and roars impressively
well shit me says:
yes, and is also capable of waiting on us. a talking lion butler
Ben says:
I like that you went full-bore for crazy town
Ben says:
He could wear a heavily customised tuxedo
well shit me says:
like a pearly king
Ben says:
Yes!
Ben says:
A cockney lion butler in heavily sequinned tuxedo
Ben says:
Called Arthur
well shit me says:
Arthur! god choice of name
well shit me says:
i like this idea
well shit me says:
*good
Ben says:
Arthur can bring us tasty treats and alcoholic beverages on silver platters whilst dispensing his affectionate, worldly wisdom and amusingly droll comments
Ben says:
"Cor blimey guv'nah, you two might be on top fo the world now, but just you watch yourselves, pride always comes before a fall, my dear ol' dad taught me that, gawd bless 'im"
well shit me says:
haha
well shit me says:
I think his favourite word would be blimey. and that he'd teach us rhyming slang with the use of amusing limericks and songs.
well shit me says:
a SINGING cockney lion butler!
Ben says:
Who sounds just like Michael Caine in Batman Begins
well shit me says:
yes!
Ben says:
"Why do we fall sir? So we can learn to pick ourselves up. And I've got a song about that and it goes a little bit like this..."
well shit me says:
ha
well shit me says:
this is awesome. WE'RE awesome!
Ben says:
And so is Arthur, the best singing cockney lion butler EVER!
well shit me says:
oh yes
well shit me says:
We need a comedy female character. like a cook or something.
Ben says:
An enormous female hippo cook witha swedish accent
Ben says:
Olga!
well shit me says:
yes olga!
Ben says:
Olga the Swedish hippo, master of the meatball, ALWAYS wears a white chef's hat
well shit me says:
I was just about to say she'll only cook meatballs.
Ben says:
GET OUT OF MY BRAIN
well shit me says:
i'm trying, but it's confusing in here
Ben says:
Sorry, I've been meaning to tidy up
well shit me says:
you really should, and get some signposts
Ben says:
You want to take a left past carnal urges (watch out, floor's slippery) then keep heading straight passed the repressed homosexuality
well shit me says:
I see, am I going the wrong way then? I'm in cute kitten territory
Ben says:
You're almost there, go straight through the middle of the kittens
well shit me says:
got it. thanks
Ben says:
No worries
Ben says:
Anyhow, yeah, Olga's surly demeanour would hide her caring and maternal side. When the going gets tough, she'd make you a nice bowl of meatball soup and give youa huge hug "Zere zere my little darlink, it will all be ok"
well shit me says:
but she's so massive the hug would leave you gasping for breath like you've just been saved from drowning. I'd forgive her just for the accent
Ben says:
Exactly
Ben says:
Her and Arthur would fight constantly to hide their hidden feelings for each other
well shit me says:
but only in front of us. Behind closed doors they'd be having weird crossbreeding sex. Imagine the dirty talk and the noises- a cockney lion and a swedish hippo. ha
Ben says:
They'd sit round the kitchen eating and drinking too much sherry before having fumbling tipsy lion-on-hippo sex. We'd smile knowingly at each other, happy that they've found someone, and pretend not to know
well shit me says:
The kitchen would be an abba only zone. and arthur wouldn't be allowed to sing anything unless it was an abba song.
Ben says:
Every now and then he'd get too drunk on sherry and start to singa mournful cockney song about the girl he left behind during the war but Olga would shake her head at him and he'd feel guilty. Then he'd start signing about her and Olga would try to shush him but she's secretly to pleased and embarrassed to stop him
well shit me says:
what romance!
Ben says:
They're from a different generation, one that prized romance and a more tender kind of love
well shit me says:
good role models for any strange lion/Hippo babies that might pop up.
Ben says:
Exactly, they'll make wonderful parents and we'll be the aunt and uncle that spoil them horribly, even though their manes get all matted from wallowing in the serengeti
Ben says:
You and Olga wouold give them baths and you'd get all broody, even though they're a seperate species, and start eyeing me thoughtfully when I roughouse with them
well shit me says:
totally, I want me some freaky hippos with lion manes. who doesn't?
Ben says:
Crazy people. That's who
well shit me says:
And we certainly are not crazy. We're awesome.
Ben says:
Exactly. Non-awesome crazy people don't have their own lion butlers
well shit me says:
but they're totally jealous that we do. and the rest of the universe bows down to us because they long to live our lives, swanning around up high with our cockney lion butler and swedish hippo cook, drinking liquid gold and eating money..
Ben says:
money and meatballs, don't forget the meatballs
well shit me says:
shit, sorry. meatballs the size of cricket balls
Ben says:
They'd be like a meat party in your mouth! And everyone's invited!
Ben says:
Wait... that didn't come out right...
well shit me says:
If I was a loser, I would have totally written lol then, I spat out my ribena on my computer
Ben says:
It's down to all the awesome. It does that to people.