I'm hoping August proves to be a much better month than July was. July was a big fat smelly cunt that punched me in the face repeatedly. By the looks of the day i've had so far...I'm still holding out hope for August to be the superior month out of the two of them. So if some people are wondering why i havn't got ahold of them in a while or why i'm being anti-social...hope these things answer your questions. And i'll try harder this time.
First...on July 16th i think it was, i almost fucking drowned. The river kicked my fucking ass and apparently wanted this ass dead! I'm traumatized and i really don't want to be submerged in water EVER AGAIN. Fuck that noise...all that noise. We were still floating on the river at 11pm...keep in mind this was a sunday, i had to get up and work the next day, meanwhile bats are flying over my head and misquitos were eating my blood and i was getting cold cause i was only in a tank top and shorts on a raft in the fucking dark. Now, at first i fucking loved it, being on the river, going over rapids...it was a first time thing for me and it was beautiful...but after the first couple hours, Tearsa and i came around a bend in the river and there were these not-so-worrysome rapids...no biggie, right? Nah...it was bloody hell, is what it was...it took us strait towards these wooden fence-like things and in front of those wooden things was big jagged peices of metal from the old bridge and a big metal pole...these two things were very close together, and thank fuck Tearsa's raft was tied to mine otherwise i'd be fucking dead. She kicked off where she didn't want our rafts to go and she grabbed onto the pole and my raft smacked into hers from the not-so-worrysome rapids and i flipped over and i was stuck under both rafts...charlie horses in both legs. I can't swim and i come up spewing water from my lungs holding on to the raft for dear life. Sucked Balls alright. I made it out obviously! Hours later still no bridge in site...that is where the ride is parked. We never made it to that bridge...we had no oars left...and my dignity went right along with them oars...somewhere deep in that water...cause i'm an idiot. We got out on the shore and i suggest we just walk to the nearest road cause we had no fucking idea where we were on the river and it was pitch black and i was fucking terrified...i wanted to go home and take a fucking shower like no other. i had to get up at 5:30am the next day...i was not prepared for this shit. So we walk and some chicks in a jeep pull over and give Jess a ride to her car..THANK FUCK! we're saved!! we made it home around 12 or 12:30am...i took a shower and got up for work the next day like the little trooper i am. I felt like i got the shit kicked outta me though...for days i felt like shit....
Then...the next morning i get up to go to work. I'm wondering where the fuck my keys are cause i don't see them anywhere in the house. I go out to the car...they were in the ignition. I had left my car on...all night. Not running but just clicked on...Enough for the battery to be fucking DEAD! So i go in wake Dan up who has only had about 2 hours of sleep and he drives me to work...not without complaint, that's to be expected. I get a ride home from Erin B. and ask my roomate Ray about jumper cables when i get home. We didn't have any but he had a friend who did so he goes and picks them up and jumps my car, i let it run for awhile like he said, to make sure it keeps a charge, he had a pool tournament so he took off and i went in the house to pass the fuck out seeing as how i only got like 4 1/2 hours sleep. I could have slept forever! I felt like such a worthless dipshit for fucking up like that.
Got up the next day to go to work again, already running 10 minutes late on leaving, i go out to my car, turn the key...the poor thing made it's attempt at starting but to no avail. Yet again i had to go in and wake up Dan after he had been sleeping for a couple hours...cause he never goes to bed at at decent hour, EVER. I was pissed that my car wouldn't start and i was going to be late to work and he was just being a supreme dick about the whole thing...i knew it was my fault but i really didn't need the blame rubbed in like salt in the wound. And he told me there was no way he was doing this a third day in a row so i was going to have to "figure something out." I was so broke and broken i felt like dying....like i should've just stayed under that water....but i was being dramatic of course...and so while at work i called my mom for some help. She had the day off so she came and picked me up, took me home, took the battery outta my peice of shit car and took it over to United. All my cells were still good in the battery so they said they just needed to charge it up...but that they wouldn't have it ready for me that day...i would have to leave it overnight, and i still had to work the next day. Shit! So my boss happened to call me and ask me about some days i had requested off and i told her i didn't know how i was getting to work the next morning and she offered to pick me up...cause she is an amazing boss. Tearsa had the day off so she was thankfully able to come to my rescue after work, she picked my ass up and took me over to go get my battery and took me home to put it back in my car and test it....IT WORKED!! and it only costed me 3 days of finding rides too and from work and the financial amount of $5.75! WOOT!! Some speck of good news in between all the shit.
There were some good points in July it was just most of the second half of the month that sucked...like my finances were fucked!! and still are actually. Between all the shitty days and the drunken haze of the weekends i had forgotten to pay the cable/internet bill...they sent me a late notice...With the fucking bill...$300. Now if i'd had looked at it more carefully i would have realized that half of it didn't need payed until August 12th...i screwed myself and now i have $1 to last me until August 10th. I hope nothing else goes wrong cause i won't have the money to pay for it...and i hope i have enough gas in my car to last me the rest of the week.
Beside ALL of that mess...the last day of July i had an uber shit day at work, everything moved slow and it was just all around "Shit on Courtney Day" i get ready to leave work...late. Sherri, my stepmom, came in to see what time she works the next day and i come out of the bathroom and talk to her a bit...she tells me my Aunt Ginny passed away. THEN...she waits a bit and tells me..."i have something to tell you, i wanted to take you out to dinner to talk about this but you didn't work the other day, and i don't want to put this off...i'm divorcing your dad."
I've got a little brother mixed up in this whole deal, and it pisses me off that i find out that my dad hasn't changed one fucking bit. He's still a selfish peice of shit that will never amount to even the lowest forms of SHIT! He has been verbally abusing my now 6 year old brother, for i don't even know how long! Long enough for Sherri to have finally had enough, for both their sakes...and the dogs....apparently my peice of shit sperm donar had been beating the dog as well as being a stoopid drug addled poopface fucker. So Sherri's moved out with my brother Tyler and the dog. I can, of course, go over and visit anytime. I won't, however, be giving my dad another chance...he's had enough chances to change and to care about something and someone over himself and his selfish needs...and he fucking blew it, for the last fucking time. Fuck him, i don't need a Father now, i'm old enough and have been for along time now and i'm able to take care of myself. I'm going to stick to help caring for my little brother and making sure he grows up good and has a semi-normal childhood. I don't need a middle-aged baby to take care of, he dug his own grave and i'm going to let him fall in it...or boot him in.
I'm sorry this blog is so incredibly and rediculously long, i had alot of updating and bitching to do so i'm sorry to all who actually read this crap. i'm going to go eat now...maybe suffocate myself...i've had a shit day...so i hope things are better tomarrow. Perhaps i'll come back after a bit and tell ya'll how today went...i just spent far too much time telling how last month went to keep typing about today right now. Fuckers.
---C---
P.S. Hidden Cracks That Don't Show...But Constantly Just Grow
First...on July 16th i think it was, i almost fucking drowned. The river kicked my fucking ass and apparently wanted this ass dead! I'm traumatized and i really don't want to be submerged in water EVER AGAIN. Fuck that noise...all that noise. We were still floating on the river at 11pm...keep in mind this was a sunday, i had to get up and work the next day, meanwhile bats are flying over my head and misquitos were eating my blood and i was getting cold cause i was only in a tank top and shorts on a raft in the fucking dark. Now, at first i fucking loved it, being on the river, going over rapids...it was a first time thing for me and it was beautiful...but after the first couple hours, Tearsa and i came around a bend in the river and there were these not-so-worrysome rapids...no biggie, right? Nah...it was bloody hell, is what it was...it took us strait towards these wooden fence-like things and in front of those wooden things was big jagged peices of metal from the old bridge and a big metal pole...these two things were very close together, and thank fuck Tearsa's raft was tied to mine otherwise i'd be fucking dead. She kicked off where she didn't want our rafts to go and she grabbed onto the pole and my raft smacked into hers from the not-so-worrysome rapids and i flipped over and i was stuck under both rafts...charlie horses in both legs. I can't swim and i come up spewing water from my lungs holding on to the raft for dear life. Sucked Balls alright. I made it out obviously! Hours later still no bridge in site...that is where the ride is parked. We never made it to that bridge...we had no oars left...and my dignity went right along with them oars...somewhere deep in that water...cause i'm an idiot. We got out on the shore and i suggest we just walk to the nearest road cause we had no fucking idea where we were on the river and it was pitch black and i was fucking terrified...i wanted to go home and take a fucking shower like no other. i had to get up at 5:30am the next day...i was not prepared for this shit. So we walk and some chicks in a jeep pull over and give Jess a ride to her car..THANK FUCK! we're saved!! we made it home around 12 or 12:30am...i took a shower and got up for work the next day like the little trooper i am. I felt like i got the shit kicked outta me though...for days i felt like shit....
Then...the next morning i get up to go to work. I'm wondering where the fuck my keys are cause i don't see them anywhere in the house. I go out to the car...they were in the ignition. I had left my car on...all night. Not running but just clicked on...Enough for the battery to be fucking DEAD! So i go in wake Dan up who has only had about 2 hours of sleep and he drives me to work...not without complaint, that's to be expected. I get a ride home from Erin B. and ask my roomate Ray about jumper cables when i get home. We didn't have any but he had a friend who did so he goes and picks them up and jumps my car, i let it run for awhile like he said, to make sure it keeps a charge, he had a pool tournament so he took off and i went in the house to pass the fuck out seeing as how i only got like 4 1/2 hours sleep. I could have slept forever! I felt like such a worthless dipshit for fucking up like that.
Got up the next day to go to work again, already running 10 minutes late on leaving, i go out to my car, turn the key...the poor thing made it's attempt at starting but to no avail. Yet again i had to go in and wake up Dan after he had been sleeping for a couple hours...cause he never goes to bed at at decent hour, EVER. I was pissed that my car wouldn't start and i was going to be late to work and he was just being a supreme dick about the whole thing...i knew it was my fault but i really didn't need the blame rubbed in like salt in the wound. And he told me there was no way he was doing this a third day in a row so i was going to have to "figure something out." I was so broke and broken i felt like dying....like i should've just stayed under that water....but i was being dramatic of course...and so while at work i called my mom for some help. She had the day off so she came and picked me up, took me home, took the battery outta my peice of shit car and took it over to United. All my cells were still good in the battery so they said they just needed to charge it up...but that they wouldn't have it ready for me that day...i would have to leave it overnight, and i still had to work the next day. Shit! So my boss happened to call me and ask me about some days i had requested off and i told her i didn't know how i was getting to work the next morning and she offered to pick me up...cause she is an amazing boss. Tearsa had the day off so she was thankfully able to come to my rescue after work, she picked my ass up and took me over to go get my battery and took me home to put it back in my car and test it....IT WORKED!! and it only costed me 3 days of finding rides too and from work and the financial amount of $5.75! WOOT!! Some speck of good news in between all the shit.
There were some good points in July it was just most of the second half of the month that sucked...like my finances were fucked!! and still are actually. Between all the shitty days and the drunken haze of the weekends i had forgotten to pay the cable/internet bill...they sent me a late notice...With the fucking bill...$300. Now if i'd had looked at it more carefully i would have realized that half of it didn't need payed until August 12th...i screwed myself and now i have $1 to last me until August 10th. I hope nothing else goes wrong cause i won't have the money to pay for it...and i hope i have enough gas in my car to last me the rest of the week.
Beside ALL of that mess...the last day of July i had an uber shit day at work, everything moved slow and it was just all around "Shit on Courtney Day" i get ready to leave work...late. Sherri, my stepmom, came in to see what time she works the next day and i come out of the bathroom and talk to her a bit...she tells me my Aunt Ginny passed away. THEN...she waits a bit and tells me..."i have something to tell you, i wanted to take you out to dinner to talk about this but you didn't work the other day, and i don't want to put this off...i'm divorcing your dad."
I've got a little brother mixed up in this whole deal, and it pisses me off that i find out that my dad hasn't changed one fucking bit. He's still a selfish peice of shit that will never amount to even the lowest forms of SHIT! He has been verbally abusing my now 6 year old brother, for i don't even know how long! Long enough for Sherri to have finally had enough, for both their sakes...and the dogs....apparently my peice of shit sperm donar had been beating the dog as well as being a stoopid drug addled poopface fucker. So Sherri's moved out with my brother Tyler and the dog. I can, of course, go over and visit anytime. I won't, however, be giving my dad another chance...he's had enough chances to change and to care about something and someone over himself and his selfish needs...and he fucking blew it, for the last fucking time. Fuck him, i don't need a Father now, i'm old enough and have been for along time now and i'm able to take care of myself. I'm going to stick to help caring for my little brother and making sure he grows up good and has a semi-normal childhood. I don't need a middle-aged baby to take care of, he dug his own grave and i'm going to let him fall in it...or boot him in.
I'm sorry this blog is so incredibly and rediculously long, i had alot of updating and bitching to do so i'm sorry to all who actually read this crap. i'm going to go eat now...maybe suffocate myself...i've had a shit day...so i hope things are better tomarrow. Perhaps i'll come back after a bit and tell ya'll how today went...i just spent far too much time telling how last month went to keep typing about today right now. Fuckers.
---C---
P.S. Hidden Cracks That Don't Show...But Constantly Just Grow
nemesis:
Actually I think that tin also has cows on it... on one side. 
I found it at a thriftstore out in the countryside this summer.. and thought it looked pretty vintage - but I guess they still make those tins today. There were no chupachups in it though. 
I found it at a thriftstore out in the countryside this summer.. and thought it looked pretty vintage - but I guess they still make those tins today. There were no chupachups in it though. 
glitch:
thanks so much for enjoying!!