Today I lost my cell phone.
I left it on the bus.
Though I may be a fucktard,
I shouldn't make a fuss.
On Monday I'll call Metro.
It's probably in their Lost and Found.
God knows I pay their goddamned salaries
Touring Puget Sound
There's still one thing that bugs me
I'd plans tonight you see.
Was gonna see Van Halen play
Not David, but Sammy.
My roommate has my ticket.
He don't know where I am.
Can't call cause I don't have my cell phone, and I don't know his number anyway because I don't know anyone's number anymore becuase I have a cell phone or at least I HAD a cell phone until TODAY when I fucking lost it on the bus and now I'm gonna miss Van Halen.
AAAANNNNDDD -- the bus driver I had today was same nimrod who beat up the guy in the wheelchair and closed the bus door on my foot! So he probably has my phone and is making phone calls to all his snotbag relatives saying how royally he "screwed this one guy over by stealing his phone and farting on it and sending lots of text messages at ten cents a pop!"
I'll bet he's going to see Van Halen just to spite me. And just the other day, I swear I overheard him say to a passenger (who was also evil, so it was ok for them to converse) that he'd "never go to see Van Halen in concert unless they got Diamond Dave back". It was either that or, "Sir, your transfer has expired." but I'm pretty sure it was the first one.
So I'm going to the movies instead. That puppet movie. BY the guys who did South Park.
I'm going there at midnight.
It'll probably be dark.
I'm walking to the Neptune.
The place on forty-fifth.
But an hour before I get there,
I'm going to drink a fifth.
You're probably thinking, "What the?"
He just rhymed 'fifth' with 'fifth'
And if I did it one more time after this,
Then that would be a fifth.
So all you lyric snobbies,
Go sit upon your thumbs.
Because I have to see a goddamn movie with puppets, instead of hearing Sammy Hagar sing "Dreams" which kicks fucking ass!
Royal Rainbow!
ON a completely unrelated note -- thanks to all youse who camed out for trivia last night! It was fun -- even if some people don't know the difference between lavendar and purple!
I left it on the bus.
Though I may be a fucktard,
I shouldn't make a fuss.
On Monday I'll call Metro.
It's probably in their Lost and Found.
God knows I pay their goddamned salaries
Touring Puget Sound
There's still one thing that bugs me
I'd plans tonight you see.
Was gonna see Van Halen play
Not David, but Sammy.
My roommate has my ticket.
He don't know where I am.
Can't call cause I don't have my cell phone, and I don't know his number anyway because I don't know anyone's number anymore becuase I have a cell phone or at least I HAD a cell phone until TODAY when I fucking lost it on the bus and now I'm gonna miss Van Halen.
AAAANNNNDDD -- the bus driver I had today was same nimrod who beat up the guy in the wheelchair and closed the bus door on my foot! So he probably has my phone and is making phone calls to all his snotbag relatives saying how royally he "screwed this one guy over by stealing his phone and farting on it and sending lots of text messages at ten cents a pop!"
I'll bet he's going to see Van Halen just to spite me. And just the other day, I swear I overheard him say to a passenger (who was also evil, so it was ok for them to converse) that he'd "never go to see Van Halen in concert unless they got Diamond Dave back". It was either that or, "Sir, your transfer has expired." but I'm pretty sure it was the first one.
So I'm going to the movies instead. That puppet movie. BY the guys who did South Park.
I'm going there at midnight.
It'll probably be dark.
I'm walking to the Neptune.
The place on forty-fifth.
But an hour before I get there,
I'm going to drink a fifth.
You're probably thinking, "What the?"
He just rhymed 'fifth' with 'fifth'
And if I did it one more time after this,
Then that would be a fifth.
So all you lyric snobbies,
Go sit upon your thumbs.
Because I have to see a goddamn movie with puppets, instead of hearing Sammy Hagar sing "Dreams" which kicks fucking ass!
Royal Rainbow!
ON a completely unrelated note -- thanks to all youse who camed out for trivia last night! It was fun -- even if some people don't know the difference between lavendar and purple!
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
baka_amerikanjin:
Easy. Dr. Julius Strangepork.
october:
sounds like a crappy day
i hope today is going better for you 

