Okay, so maybe trying to kill myself wasn't such a hot idea. OD'ing on sleeping pills is fun for like...the first 2 hours....then the following 72 hours are a living hell. Not to mention scaring the living shit out of those who are my true friends. I don't know why I'm taking things so hard, I really wish I wasn't. Not so close to school when I need to be on the ball. Oh well, at least I have recovery time and this didn't happen 6 months from now. So I'm taking a 1 year hiatus from dating/sex/making out/making new friends/meeting people. I cannot deal with drama at this point in my life. I cannot deal with fake people. I cannot deal with lies. I cannot deal with anything unnecessary in my life right now. Perhaps sometime in the future, someone out there will truely appreciate everything I have to offer, in the meantime, I absolutley will not exert myself anymore or let myself become attatched to people who don't deserve my time. I know what I want; it's not to control someones life or tell them who they can hang out with, I want loyalty, not betrayal. To me, betrayal is the number 1 sin in the Book of Lauren. Do that, and you are dead to me. In my book, people take away everything they brought in with them....including friends. I plan on doing the same. If one or both parties do not agree, then they are both free to do what they want, but I will no longer be a part of either of their lives. Either that, or they better come up with a damn good system of lying to me. Ignorance is bliss.
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