I don't know where else to talk about this, so I figured why not here? I'm surrounded by like minded people, maybe someone can relate? Give guidance maybe.
This entry is about sex. Limits. Boundaries. Chemistry. Addiction.. The need for gratification, self-assurance. The people we cannot help but love, even if it's bad for yourself, even if it hurts other people. I've always been sexually charged. I have been sexually open, a unicorn as they say, for YEARS. Even when I was married, I was allowed.. actually encouraged to sleep with other females. This isn't about my crazy untraditional marriage.
It's been fine, I guess... but ultimately empty. I'm tired of being the substitute, the plan b, the 3rd wheel, the toy you pull out of the top drawer. I have to make a change. In myself. Even though I like it, I thoroughly enjoy it... but it also makes me feel like shit. Worthless. Empty, replaceable, forgetable.
Might be taking some time off sex.
I wonder if I'll even be able to.
I'm sure when you all saw the title of this you were expecting something COMPLETELY different. Honestly I've wrote this blog about 10 different times. I couldn't keep it in anymore.
Anyway, thanks for giving me a place to say all this.
@rambo @lyxzen @missy @kiley
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
blaizee:
@cooky I totally hear you girl, my boyfriend has depression and the meds completely kill off his libido. I'm constantly feeling a similar way, worthless and down about myself, because of it. Hold in there, you're beautiful and know you're worth so much more than you feel ❤
user3800866:
I feel you. It's fun being the unicorn but eventually you want something of your own! The break from sex didn't work for me but I definitely became more strict as to who I share my time with.